The Physician Assistant Personal Statement Workshop

Hi Katie, I like the image of you as a kid watching medical shows on TV, but for purposes of this essay, you’re taking up valuable space that could be used to talk about your healthcare experiences in more detail. When I interviewed Admissions Directors and faculty from across the country, every person said they […]

Hi Jordan, You’re a good writer, a huge plus, and have an excellent, easy to read yet sophisticated style. All those are sure to grab the attention of admissions folks. You’ve improved the essay, but it still needs work. You open with a literal cliffhanger, and I see that you’re tied to the mountain climbing […]

In this sixth installment of our special week-long personal statement workshop, we continue to pull essays submitted from the comments section through our free essay submission process and provide you, and our users, with a more detailed analysis of their essays. This sixth submission is by Lindsay. It starts with a story of her time spent […]

Hi Jacob, You’ve certainly accomplished much already. Your compassion and dedication to helping people is evident, and your future patients will benefit greatly. The essay, though, focuses too much on your Living Legends and mission work. I’ll show you a couple of places to cut some of that to leave room to write about your […]

Hi Parn, You have a lot of great experience and good writing skills, things many applicants lack. That’s gives you a definite edge. However, there are ways to tighten your essay and really make it shine. You don’t need the first paragraph at all. It’s so remote in time and such a common occurrence (yes, […]

Hi Gabe, You have an impressive resume and have chronicled it very well. You did an excellent job with just a couple of words — “confining wooden chair in a small hovel” of describing Jane Doe’s living conditions. Of course, I still have suggestions, including a couple of grammar/writing tips. First, when you include dialogue, […]

By: Sue Edmondson (The PA Essay Collaborative) A note to Justine, If there’s anything positive to say about your diagnosis at age 15 is the tremendous insight it gave you about the medical profession. You’re smart to open your essay that way. The other things you write about are good, too. It’s important to explain why […]

By: Sue Edmondson (The PA Essay Collaborative) A Note to Josh: The opening two paragraphs of your essay are excellent. They grabbed my attention immediately, and made me want to keep reading. That’s your goal! You could eliminate a few words to make it flow better. For example, here’s a revised sentence. I’m guessing you […]