"In my life, family will always be my greatest priority. I love my patients like I love life itself, but I love my family even more than life itself." - Stephen Pasquini PA-C.
Years ago, I dreamt of being an MD.
Since I was a small child, in fact, to me, this would be the pinnacle of life. Stethoscope around my neck, working in the trenches, saving lives!
This was my childhood dream and my young adult dream, all the way through college.
Not even Organic Chemistry could stop me. I just pushed through it, head to the grindstone, determined to reach my goal.
Then one year away from finishing all my pre-med training, something happened: I met a physician assistant!
To me, life has always been more than my job. The reason I created this website is that I love art, photography, and technology. I love kids, the outdoors, and my family. I love to surf, bike, and take my son and daughter for long walks. I like to make shapes out of the clouds, go on long weekend getaways, take my wife out dancing.
I love life!
If you don't know already, being a doctor requires a TON of sacrifices.
If you are not prepared to give your life over to medicine, then I encourage you to take a long deep inward look at yourself and decide if what you want is really MD.
Before many hours working at the University of Washington Medical Center, I thought to be a doctor was fun like Michael J. Fox in the movie "Doc Hollywood" or rugged like the doctors on Mash. I wanted to be like George Clooney in the TV show ER.
This is an illusion. Being a Dr. means long hours, late nights on call, missed birthdays, missed anniversaries often second marriages. That last one is the part that is like the movies.
Wants vs. Needs
I realized that what I wanted most out of life was to help people be healthy. I love the human body, I love anatomy, and I love science.
I liked the thought of propping a young child upon the exam room table, making a funny face, and treating their ear infection.
I loved the idea of sewing up a wound, setting a fracture, being there when another human being needed someone to hold onto.
Helping someone come to terms with death while helping another come to terms with life.
I didn't want MD; I wanted all of the above. There was no other way.
Finding Balance
I have met more doctors who want to be PAs than PAs who want to be doctors.
Why? Because there is more to life than medicine. PAs have the unique opportunity to live this.
It is not about being lazy; it is not about a lack of dedication. PAs tend to be some of the most dedicated and hard-working people I know.
PA is the sweet spot! Where life and medicine meet in the middle.
I honestly believe you can be better at compassion when you are more grounded. Having a life outside of work justifies life. It makes for a happy person, which translates to better patient care.
After quite a bit of soul-searching, I realized that I never really needed to be a doctor, but I wanted to feel like one.
If you are on this journey to being a healthcare provider, know that life exists beyond MD. It is a beautiful life, and it has fulfilled every single one of my dreams of being an excellent health care provider.
And every time I prop a small child up on the exam room table and write the script to make their ear feel better, I smile. Then I go home in the evening and give my kids and my wife a big hug and a kiss.
In my life family will always be my highest priority. I love my patients like I love life itself, but I love my family even more than life itself. Click To TweetI don't think I could have found this balance as an MD, and I thank my lucky stars that life, or God or whatever directed me to UMDNJ, to PA School, to the job of my dreams.
Being a PA is truly where life and medicine have found the perfect balance. I hope you, too, will give the physician assistant profession consideration as you go about life and pursue a rewarding career in the field of medicine.
Warmly,
Stephen Pasquini PA-C
Recommended reading:
Often the decision between PA and MD is considered a difficult one, but should it be? Click Here.
Kaisha says
What helped you decide? I am very confused right now. Some days I want to become and MD and some days I do not. I have to take mcat and already finished my bachelor’s with all the prerequisites courses.
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Kaisha,
It really came down to a lifestyle choice. I had been working in the hospital/clinic for two years by the time I was a Junior in college and changed my major. Working alongside doctors, residents, and PAs clinched my decision. If you are unsure get some exposure and the decision will become very clear. Also, consider making a weighted average matrix, you can read more about that here: https://www.thepalife.com/decision-matrix/
Stephen
David J Grossfeld says
Hi Stephen,
I am training to be an EKG tech in a NY hospital. I will start soon. Do you think this is a good way to see how PA’s and MD’s work and to help with my decision between the 2?
Thanks
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Yes I do, as long as you are working in an environment with a mix of different types of medical providers it will be a wonderful learning experience.
Stephen
Catherine says
Hi Stephen!
I’m currently a sophomore (20 y/o) in University and I’m still not sure whether I want to go the PA or MD/DO route. I know that a lot of people in med school or in their residencies have personal fulfillments they want to complete (i.e. relationships, marriage, etc.) but I am not too worried about that. I can afford Med School tuition so I am not worried about the financial aspects of becoming a doctor either. I also do not mind going to school and doing residency in my late 20s/early 30s if it pertains to my career. Those are the main reasons why people around my age choose to become a PA yet those do not bother me at all!
The areas of medicine I’m interested in is primary care, family medicine, and pediatrics. The specialties that I would like to go into would be endocrinology, dermatology, psychiatry, or pathology. I’m not even sure what the home-life situation would be for physicians in these fields but I’m sure they’re better than a surgeons!
My GPA is good (anticipating a 3.6-3.8 range by graduation) and I have not taken the MCAT/GRE yet.
I have always wanted to become a “Dr. Catherine” ever since I could remember–there hasn’t been any other career that I wanted to go into besides healthcare! I just don’t know what questions I need to ask myself in order to decide which career I should choose. I think the only thing that makes me want to go into PA is that there is less stress and less chance of getting sued yet I am not sure if that is true for the fields I want to work in. I hear that PAs work the same amount of time and can be as stressed as doctors. Any advice?
Thanks!
Catherine.
Sehena says
Medicine is in my blood. As a young child I was sick a lot and was often in the hospital because of it. I actually grew to love the environment. All the technical stuff that went into it and just the general process. It didn’t exactly help that I had two family members that were in the medical field either, both my mother (a nurse) and my grandfather (a surgeon). I had other dreams though, so it never really occurred to me that I might be interested in actually becoming a doctor until I was a bit older. I was in my mid twenties. That’s actually what I’m working towards now. I just have a few questions that need answering before I decide which path to take.
Unlike you, I’ve never been interested in finding romance or having a family of my own. I love my nieces and nephews but I need a break away from them every now and again. I’m just not a family type of gal. However I do have other hobbies. The beach, traveling, writing.
My question is if I do decide to become a full fledged doctor instead of an assistant, how many hours would I be working as opposed to a PA? Would I have time to invest in my other hobbies as I do now or would I be dedicating every waking moment?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Sehena,
It really depends on what specialty you choose to pursue as a doctor. Working in the ER, urgent care, telemedicine, inter-service, global health, hospitalist etc. etc. can open up a lot of opportunities for developing a healthy work life balance. In my experience surgeons tend to have the worst hours, but I am sure with some creativity and priority setting you can find a lifestyle that suits your needs in any profession or medicine specialty. Now as more and more doctors are going to work for large institutions and group practices things may continue to get better as the work load becomes more distributed. I would definitely spend some time with doctors, PAs, nurses and NPs and see what seems to suit your needs. Emergency medicine may be a good fit… lots of the ER docs I know are serial adventurers!
Stephen
Sarah says
Hi Stephen:
I am also torn between trying to become a doctor or PA working in the pediatric medical world. I am leaning towards becoming a PA but am unsure about the number of pediatric PA positions. What is your opinion?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Sarah,
One way to make your decision is to visit some of the pediatric facilities (hospitals and clinics) in your area and see how they utilize PAs. As a PA in primary care in the rural area where I was working 80% of my day was spent seeing pediatric patients. So in some settings you can see the full spectrum but find a primary care clinic where you will be seeing a high percentage of pediatric patients. I personally have not met many PAs specializing in pediatric medicine. This certainly doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist. I would do some research and see what you find out. There are probably more opportunities in teaching institutions that have dedicated pediatric wards or pediatric ERs. It will be fun to do some research and I think this will make things clearer and you will know if this is indeed the avenue you should pursue.
Stephen
MamaMo says
I recently moved to America to stay finally with my family. Husband and two young kids. I am a MD from my country amd i am worried about taking the boards as a FLY as well as not being able to be with my family. I am very family oriented. I have decided to become a PA here. I do not know how easy it will be or the journey to it but reading your post has put the light at the end of the tunnel for me. Thank you so much for this
MamaMo says
Lol
FMG (foreign medical graduate ) not FLY
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Thank you MamaMo, please feel free to drop me a line anytime you have questions along the way.
Warmly,
Stephen Pasquini PA-C
http://www.thepalife.com
http://www.smartypance.com
Charisse A. says
This article really did solidify a lot for me, so thank you for that! I am still on the fence about choosing PA or MD. I’m a senior in college and graduate next year, but have decided to do a post-baccalaureate program to strengthen myself as an applicant. For YEARS, I’ve said I wanted to be a doctor; a Neonatologist, to be exact. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that though I love medicine, I also want to have a family and be able to commit as much time as I can with them. I fear that if I choose the MD route, I’ll be burned out early on and won’t have time for a family, but if I choose the PA route, I almost fear that I’ll always ask myself “what if” in regards to med school.
Jordan Prouse says
Stephen! Thank you so much for this article. I am currently in my sophomore year of my undergrad to obtain my nursing degree. Is the transition into PA school possible? My biggest concern is the pre-requisite courses that will be asked of me. I was wondering if you have some insight on this topic! Thanks!
Patel says
Hiii! I’m a sophomore in high school, and I wanted to plan ahead for my future. I know I want to be in the medical field, and I was thinking about becoming a PA. I love thinking that I can help people in a way that makes me feel good about it. I have one question though, what does it take to be a PA and the process?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Patel, because this question involves several steps I have put together a basic resource: https://www.thepalife.com/pre-physician-assistant-getting-started-guide/
Ethan says
Hi Stephen,
Here is a great article I came across about decision making. It is relevant to becoming a PA, NP, or MD/DO and for any difficult future decisions one has to make, really. I know it has given me a lot of peace about thinking of my own future educational endeavors, and I hope others will find it beneficial, too, if you would like to share it or make reference to it when giving advice.
Thanks for your great blog!
Ethan
Milani says
Hi Stephen,
Thank you so much for your very informative article. I found it in the midst of trying to find a career field that pays well but also offers that life balance in the medical field. I wanted to know if you dont mind sharing, how many days a week do you work and on average how long are the shifts ? Prior to reading your article I was considering being a nurse. Now its between that and being a PA. Based on what you know would you say being a PA offers more or less life balance than being a nurse or about the same ?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Milani, you have came to the right person – since my wife is an RN 🙂
Now that I have been a PA for over 13 years I find my ability to control my schedule is much better than when I first graduated. I prioritize this as well, and make sure that my employers understand that I prefer a variable schedule with the ability to work part time. I currently work 30 hours per week (3 – 10 hour shifts). I did this intentionally so that I could focus on providing continued value here on the site (which takes a surprisingly large amount of time) and have time to dedicate to my family. My wife works .8 as an RN currenlty working nights in med/surg. She chose nights because it just happens to work very well with our kids’ schedule although probably she will convert to days in a year or so. Both of our jobs provide a great life/work balance. Personally, the role of a PA suits me perfectly and I don’t think I would have been happy working as an RN for the long-run… But it is just a difference in goals. My wife is the “bomb” at what she does and I have a tremendous amount of respect for what she does for her patients. In California our pay is very similar although my wife can sometimes command a better salary as an RN – especially if she is working per-diem. Most RN’s make more than their NP counterparts here in the Bay Area. My personal opinion, having known many RNs and PAs, is that we PAs are generally more content with our jobs and I am not completely sure why this is. We are just a pretty satisfied bunch 🙂
Hope this helps,
Stephen
Wendy Ochoa says
Thank you so much for writing this article. You helped me make a life-changing decision and now I know I want to be a PA. All I want is to help people and learn about the human body but also have a happy balanced life. I’ve been struggling for quite some time in choosing what path in medicine I would like to study but now I know. So really, THANK YOU!
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Wendy,
Just remember, life balance is a choice in all professions and your time must be guarded carefully. The beauty of the PA profession is the degree of options and flexibility you will have. Hang in there and I wish you the best on your journey!!!
Stephen
Tami says
Hello Stephen,
I just read this article of yours and I’m so glad I did. For a few days now I was debating whether I can even become a PA. I went to college thinking I will be a MD but certain situations made me realize I don’t wantto be a doctor but a PA. I just graduated from college a couple of months ago and I’m now striving to become a PA.
I also want to have a lifestyle with my family, friends and of course my future kids so I have to ask how are the hours of a PA. Both part time and full time ? I would love some feedback on it !
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Tami,
My hours and lifestyle have definitely improved as I have been working for longer in the field. As a new graduate you don’t have much career capital to toss around, so as an applicant you may not be as attractive. I definitely worked longer hours and more variable shifts during my first 2 years. But I was new, and for me this was a period of growth. As I built up skills and a network of providers who believed in me and would give me strong recommendations I was able to negotiate with my employer. This is probably true with all professions. If you can prove yourself a valuable asset you will have a lot more options. I have worked 30 hour weeks now for some time, I do this for many reasons – I like to work on this website, the podcast and smartypance.com website. To do this I need to make time in my schedule. As a PA there are many opportunities for part time or reduced work weeks, but this will not always be available as a new graduate. You will likely have to put in your time and then make your life and your work fit your top priorities. For me this volunteerism, my family, my patients and opportunities to help others through this blog. But you have to guard your time carefully…. Regardless of the profession.
That being said, I still think PA is one of the best jobs out there!!!
Stephen
Roger Dolan says
As a freshman in college i went in thinking i wanted to be a doctor because i love helping others and i love the human body. The only problem with becoming a doctor is the time it takes away from life outside of the profession. It is so time consuming that the other great aspects of life get pushed to the side, and that is not the life values that i have; my life values are to have a profession that i am passionate about but most importantly have time for my life outside of that, and your article about becoming a Physician Assistant and how your life is the perfect balance helped make me choose the definitive path of becoming a PA. So thanks!
Roger Dolan says
Also if you wouldn’t mind is there some way i can pick your brain privately? I have a few questions.
Olivia Pianese says
Hi Stephen,
Although I am a high school senior, I have spent an excessive amount of time planning my future, and I’d like you to know, as cheesy as it sounds, that your article truly just changed my life! I am applying early decision to Cornel University for Nutritional Sciences and had my heart set on pre-med. I already know I want a family and I have small goals in mind like making dinner every night, taking my kids to school, going on weekend getaways with my husband… As much as I want my medical degree, the lifestyle I NEED is simply unattainable. I recently started looking into life as a PA and what it would take for me to get there. The more I think about it, the happier it makes me and this article truly just set my mind to it. As a PA, I would be able to dedicate more time to my PHD and writing a book on Blue Zones throughout the world. My small goals seem more reachable. Thank you for writing this and doing what you do. I truly appreciate it. Please let me know if I can reach out with questions.
Sincerely,
Olivia Pianese
Future PA 🙂
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Olivia, thank you so much for your kind words, this means the world to me. And yes, you can drop me a line anytime, either via the contact form or here in the comments. If there is something you are particularly keen on discussing we can always open up a discussion in a blog article as well in the hopes of helping others who feel the same as you and I do 🙂
Take care and best wishes to you on your journey!!
Warmly,
Stephen P.
karen says
My mom is pressuring me to be a doctor but I can’t see myself sacrificing so much time and money, I would much rather be a PA and get done quicker and have a life. She says PAs are respected much less but I disagree. What are your thoughts?
Bob says
I dont think you should go into medicine at all. You seem to want an easy lifestyle and dont really care too much about the learning process. Albeit it is all conjecture, but the attitude of i want to just skip the hard part and have a great life and make money, but my parents want me to have more respect, but i think ill get enough respect as a pa….is not the mentality if a good and ethical healthcare provider.
Generally speaking, the admisisons standards to become a doctor is higher than to become a pa. You need to be very smart for Both professions, but if you have that higher order of thinking and reasoning to be able to be a good provider, you should become an MD. While most schools dont want to reputation of pa school as MD rejects, the fact of the matter is that many PA students were premed students but could not make through the hurdles to get into MD school. Granted, there are many who are also people who did not want to go through the endless training to become a doctor, but te generalizations still apply. If you have the drive and ambition to be the best provider for your patients, become a doctor.
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Karen,
Don’t listen to Bob, “choosing to be a PA doesn’t mean you want an easy lifestyle and don’t really care about the learning process” and yes, although many PAs were on a pre-med track it doesn’t mean that they chose PA in order to avoid hard work, it is a different profession altogether. One with its own challenges and learning curve. If you care deeply about affecting the lives of others and you want to pursue a balanced lifestyle this is not selfish it is knowing your boundaries and pursuing goals that are within them. Can you have balance as a doctor? Maybe, I don’t know, it is certainly challenging…and there is an investment of time. You can always make more money, but you can’t buy more time… with your kids, with your loved ones, possibly working within your community or pursuing a parallel passion outside of healthcare.
The statement “if you have the drive and ambition to be the best provider for your patients, become a doctor” is ridiculous. Some of the best patient advocates I know aren’t even medical providers. The degree is not what makes or breaks you as a provider. It is what you do with the degree that matters and how that fits into your life and those whom you love and live for.
Stephen
Bob says
Stephen,
I. Had no intention of being disrepctful… Please know that I am not saying PA are incompetent compared to MD’s. And of course a degree does not make or break you as a provider. In fact, there are some PA’s who have been practicing for a long enough time that they are very competent. My focus is on the individual. And, with all things being equal, John Doe will receive more education/training/knowledge by becoming an MD than by becoming a PA. PA’s can do 80% of what an MD can do, but that extra 20% of learning rare diseases and what not helps you become the best provider you can be. Of course the degree is not what makes or breaks you as a provider, but to say that getting an MD degree is the same as a PA degree is absurd.
So again, I’m not saying incompetent people become PA’s. I’m saying that you, as the indvidiual, will learn more and become better prepared as an MD than as a PA.
Ryan says
Question. How come doctors can’t do what pa do? Can’t they decid to have a schedule just like a pa but take the sacrifice of a lower salary?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Ryan,
I once worked with a doctor who tried hard to convince the hospital admin to pull him off call, take a salary cut and allow him to work on a fixed schedule in the clinic like the PAs. As a newer MD at our hospital they needed him to perform rounds and take hospital call, so it was out of the question. Of course he had agreed to one thing in his contract then after burning out, wanted a change. He left our hospital shortly thereafter. There are some MD specialties that certainly allow for a better lifestyle than others and I am sure if you make this a priority in your job search you may be able to find a contract and a schedule that lines up with your goals. There will always be more school and more debt which plays a big role. And as a new graduate you often have to “put in your time” before you have enough job equity to build a better schedule. This of course is consistent among most professions.
Stephen
yami says
hi
am an img(doctor )from india.i finished my MD pathology in 2016 and i wanna become a physician assistant.
do i have to do all the coursework again from US?or just GRE and TOETEL is enough to apply?
Stephen Pasquini PA-C says
Hi Yami,
It depends, you must have all the necessary prerequisite coursework and make sure that your credits are indeed transferable. It is best to contact a few of the PA programs you are interested in and ask theme this questions directly so as to avoid any confusion. Also, not all schools require the GRE and/or TOEFL. You cans search by this criteria on my sister site at http://www.paschoolfinder.com (I am updating the database as we speak). Also, you will have to have a solid understanding of the PA profession, shadowing hours here in the US would be very helpful!
Stephen