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Single Edit One-on-one Service Supplemental Essays
Your success is our passion. (See just some of our 100's of testimonials and comments below). We are ready to help. Our current PA school essay editing service status (26th April 2024): Accepting New Submissions
(Photo: Me circa 1987, just thinking about my future PA School Essay)
- Are you struggling to write your physician assistant personal statement?
- Are you out of ideas, or just need a second opinion?
- Do you want an essay that expresses who you truly are and grabs the reader's attention in the required 5,000-character limit?
We are here to help perfect your PA school essay
I have written countless times on this blog about the importance of your personal statement in the PA school application process. Beyond the well-established metrics (GPA, HCE/PCE hours, requisite coursework, etc.), the personal statement is the most crucial aspect of your application.
This is your time to express yourself, show your creativity, skills, and background, and make a memorable impression in seconds. This will be your only chance, so you must get it right the first time.
For some time, I had been dreaming about starting a physician assistant personal statement collaborative.
A place where PA school applicants like yourself can post their PA school essays and receive honest, constructive feedback followed by an acceptance letter to the PA school of your choice!
I have been reviewing a ton of essays recently, so many in fact that I can no longer do this on my own.
To solve this problem, I have assembled a team of professional writers, editors, and PA school admissions specialists who worked to revise and perfect my PA school application essay.
Beth Eakman has taught college writing and worked as a professional writer and editor since the late 1990s. Her projects have involved a wide range of disciplines and media, from editing technical reports to scriptwriting for the PBS Kids show Super Why! Her writing has appeared in publications including Brain, Child Magazine, New York Family Magazine, and Austin Family Magazine. Beth lives with her family just outside Austin, Texas. She is driven to help each client tell the best version of their story and achieve their dream of becoming a physician assistant.
Deanna Matzen is an author with articles featured in Earth Letter, Health Beats, Northwest Science & Technology, and the Transactions of the American Fisheries Society. With an early career in environmental science, she developed a solid foundation in technical writing. Her communication skills were further honed by producing and editing content for a non-profit website, blog, and quarterly journal. Inspired to extend her craft, she obtained a certificate in literary fiction, which she draws on to build vibrant scenes that bring stories to life. Deanna loves working with pre-PAs who are on the cusp of new beginnings to find their unique story and tell it confidently.
Carly Hallman is a professional writer and editor with a B.A. in English Writing and Rhetoric (summa cum laude) from St. Edward's University in Austin, Texas. She has worked as a curriculum developer, English teacher, and study abroad coordinator in Beijing, China, where she moved in 2011. In college, she was a Gilman Scholar and worked as a staff editor for her university's academic journal. Her first novel, Year of the Goose, was published in 2015, and her first memoir is forthcoming from Little A Books. Her essays and creative writing have appeared in The L.A. Review of Books, The Guardian, LitHub, and Identity Theory, among other publications.
Read more client testimonials or purchase a revision
We Work as a Team
Our team of professional editors is wonderful at cutting out the "fluff" that makes an essay lose focus and sets people over the 5,000-character limit. Their advice is always spot-on.
Sue, Sarah, and Carly are amazingly creative writers who will take your "ordinary" and turn it into entirely extraordinary.
I mean it when I say this service is one-of-a-kind! We have spent countless hours interviewing PA School admissions directors and faculty from across the country to find out exactly what it is they are looking for in your personal statement.
We even wrote a book about it.
To collaborate, we use Google Drive. Google Drive is free, has an intuitive interface with integrated live comments in the sidebar, the ability to have a real-time chat, to collaborate effortlessly, and to compare, revise, or restore revisions on the fly. Google Drive also has an excellent mobile app that will allow you to make edits on the go!
Our team has worked with hundreds of PA school applicants within the Google Drive environment, and we have had enormous success.
The Physician Assistant Essay and Personal Statement Collaborative
I have set up two options that I hope will offer everyone a chance to participate:
- One-of-a-kind, confidential, paid personal statement review service
- A collaborative, free one (in the comments section)
Private, One-On-One Personal Statement Review Service
If you are interested in the paid service, you may choose your plan below.
The Personal Statement Review Service is:
- Behind closed doors within a private, secure network using Google Drive.
- It is completely interactive, meaning we will be able to provide real-time comments and corrections using the Google Drive interface.
- Telephone consultations are included with all edits above the single edit level. It’s often hard to communicate exactly what you want hundreds of miles away; for this reason, we offer the option to edit right along with us over the telephone while sharing in real-time over Google Drive. This is an option available to all our paid clients who purchase above the single edit level.
- We provide both revision and editing of all essays. What’s the difference? See below
- We will provide feedback, advice, and help with brainstorming and topic creation if you would like.
- We will help with a “final touch-up” before the big day, just in case your essay needs a few minor changes.
Why Choose Our Service?
- It’s not our opinion that matters. We have gone the extra step and personally interviewed PA school administrators from across the US to find out exactly what they think makes a personal statement exceptional.
- We are a team of PAs and professional writers, having worked over ten years with PA school applicants like yourself, providing countless hours of one-on-one editing and revision.
- Our clients receive interviews, and many go on to receive acceptance into their PA School of choice.
Because we always give 100%, we will open the essay collaborative for a limited number of applicants each month and then close this depending on the amount of editing that needs to be done and the time that is available.
Our goal is not quantity but quality. We want only serious applicants who are serious about getting into PA school.
Writing is not a tool like a piece of software but more like how a photograph can capture your mood. It’s more like art. The process of developing a unique, memorable personal statement is time-intensive, and it takes hours to compose, edit, finalize, and personalize an essay.
As Antoinette Bosco once said:
And this is why I am charging for this service. We love helping people find stories that define their lives, and we love helping individuals who have the passion to achieve their dreams. It’s hard to describe the feeling I get when an applicant writes back to tell me they were accepted into PA school.
There is no price tag I can place on this; it’s the feeling we get when we help another human being. It’s just like providing health care. But this takes time.
Interested? Choose your plan below.
Read more client testimonials.
Free Personal Statement Review
Post your essay in the comments section for a free critique
We want to make this opportunity available to everyone who would like help with their essay, and that is why we are offering free, limited feedback on the blog.
You post your essay in the comments section, and you will get our critique. It is that easy. We will try to give feedback to every single person who posts their COMPLETE essay here on this blog post in the comments section.
Also, by posting your comment, we reserve the right to use your essay.
We will provide feedback on essays that are complete and fit the CASPA requirements (View CASPA requirements here). We will not provide feedback on partial essays or review opening or closing statements. Your essay will be on a public platform, which has both its benefits and some obvious drawbacks. The feedback is limited, but we will try to help in any way we can.
Note: Comment Rules: Remember what Fonzie was like? Cool. That’s how we’re gonna be — cool. Critical is fine, but if you’re rude, I will delete your stuff. Otherwise, have fun, and thanks for adding to the conversation! And this should go without saying: if you feel the need to plagiarize someone else’s content, you do not deserve to go to PA school.
* Also, depending on the time of year, it may take me several weeks to reply!
We love working with PA school applicants, but don't just take our word for it!
How to submit your essay for the paid service
If you are serious and would like to have real, focused, and personalized help writing your personal statement, please choose your level of service and submit your payment below.
After you have submitted your payment, you will be redirected to the submissions page, where you can send us your essay as well as any special instructions. We will contact you immediately upon receipt of your payment and essay so we may begin work right away.
Pricing is as follows:
Choose your plan, then click "Buy Now" to submit your essay, and we will get started right away!
Every purchase includes a FREE digital copy of our new 100-page eBook, How to Write Your Physician Assistant Personal Statement, Our 101 PA School Admission Essays e-book, the expert panel audiobook, and companion workbook. This is a $65 value included for free with your purchase.
All credit card payments are processed via PayPal over a secure HTTPS server. Once your payment is processed, you will be immediately redirected back to the essay submission page. There, you will submit your essay along with some biographical info and all suggestions or comments you choose to provide. You will receive immediate confirmation that your essay has been securely transmitted as well as your personal copy of "How to Write Your Physician Assistant Personal Statement." Contact [email protected] if you have any questions, comments, or problems - I am available 24/7.
The hourly service includes your original edit and one-on-one time over Google Drive. It is simple to add more time if necessary, but you may be surprised at what a difference just a single edit can make. We find our four-hour service to be the most effective in terms of time for follow-up and full collaboration. We are open to reduced-rate add-ons to suit your individual needs.
Writing and Revision
All writing benefits from rewriting when done well.
When you are in the process of writing a draft of an essay, you should be thinking first about revision, not editing.
What’s the difference?
Revision refers to the substantial changing of text. For example, it may include re-organizing ideas and paragraphs, providing additional examples or information, and rewriting a conclusion for clarity.
Editing, on the other hand, refers to correcting mistakes in spelling, grammar, and punctuation.
On all submissions, we perform both revision and editing.
How to submit your PA school essay for the FREE editing service
Follow the rules above and get to work below in the comments section. I look forward to reading all your essay submissions.
- Stephen Pasquini PA-C
View all posts in this series
- How to Write the Perfect Physician Assistant School Application Essay
- The Physician Assistant Essay and Personal Statement Collaborative
- Do You Recognize These 7 Common Mistakes in Your Personal Statement?
- 7 Essays in 7 Days: PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 1, “A PA Changed My Life”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 2, “I Want to Move Towards the Forefront of Patient Care”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 3, “She Smiled, Said “Gracias!” and Gave me a Big Hug”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 4, “I Have Gained so Much Experience by Working With Patients”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 5, “Then Reach, my Son, and Lift Your People up With You”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 6, “That First Day in Surgery was the First Day of the Rest of my Life”
- PA Personal Statement Workshop: Essay 7, “I Want to Take People From Dying to Living, I Want to Get Them Down From the Cliff.”
- Physician Assistant Personal Statement Workshop: “To say I was an accident-prone child is an understatement”
- 9 Simple Steps to Avoid Silly Spelling and Grammar Goofs in Your PA School Personel Statement
- 5 Tips to Get you Started on Your Personal Essay (and why you should do it now)
- How to Write Your Physician Assistant Personal Statement The Book!
- How to Write “Physician Assistant” The Definitive PA Grammar Guide
- 101 PA School Admissions Essays: The Book!
- 5 Things I’ve Learned Going Into My Fourth Physician Assistant Application Cycle
- 7 Tips for Addressing Shortcomings in Your PA School Personal Statement
- The #1 Mistake PRE-PAs Make on Their Personal Statement
- The Ultimate PA School Personal Statement Starter Kit
- The Ultimate Guide to CASPA Character and Space Limits
- 10 Questions Every PA School Personal Statement Must Answer
- 5 PA School Essays That Got These Pre-PAs Accepted Into PA School
- 7 Questions to Ask Yourself While Writing Your PA School Personal Statement
- 101 PA School Applicants Answer: What’s Your Greatest Strength?
- 12 Secrets to Writing an Irresistible PA School Personal Statement
- 7 Rules You Must Follow While Writing Your PA School Essay
- You Have 625 Words and 2.5 Minutes to Get Into PA School: Use Them Wisely
- What’s Your #1 Personal Statement Struggle?
- 31 (NEW) CASPA PA School Personal Statement Examples
- How to Prepare for Your PA School Interview Day Essay
- Should You Write Physician Associate or Physician Assistant on Your PA School Essay?
- Meet the World’s Sexiest PA School Applicants
- PA School Reapplicants: How to Rewrite Your PA School Essay for Guaranteed Success
- How to Write a Personal Statement Intro that Readers Want to Read
- PA School Reapplicant Personal Statement Checklist
- How to Deal with Bad News in Your Personal Statement
- Inside Out: How to use Pixar’s Rules of Storytelling to Improve your PA Personal Statement
- Ratatouille: A Pixar Recipe for PA School Personal Statement Success
- Personal Statement Panel Review (Replay)
- Mind Mapping: A Tool for Personal Statements, Supplemental Essays, and Interviews
- Start at the End: Advice for your PA School Personal Statement
Katrina says
Being outdoors, surrounded by nature, brings peace and healing to many people. This is especially true for me; it has always been a source of relaxation and a way to find joy. I have thoroughly enjoyed hiking throughout my life but have always wanted to find a deeper connection with my surroundings as I walk. The first time I rock climbed outdoors I felt that yearning satisfied. Holding and trusting the rock while surrounded by epic view gives me everything I love from hiking with a deeper connection to the earth. When I reflect on the gratification I get from rock climbing, I realize those same feelings apply to my experience working in health care so far.
In climbing there is an inherit risk of falling that can be easy to fixate on while on the face of a canyon or mountain. If a climber is focused on falling it takes away their focus from their next move which increases the risk of falling. Trusting the team that you are climbing with is also critical. There must be perfect communication and collaboration with your group of climbers to have a safe ascent. Being able to remain calm in tense situations and communicate with a team are skill that came naturally to me when I first started climbing. The 10 years of military health care experience I’ve had instilled those attributes and I am able to apply them to other adventures with ease.
When I graduated high school and joined the Air Force, I undoubtedly knew I wanted to work in the medical field. I was a student athletic trainer during my last two years of high school. The role was primarily providing athletes with water, but I got to observe many of the physical therapy treatments performed by the school’s athletic trainer. This is when my interest in healthcare first sparked. When I signed myself up for my first college classes it was with the intent to become an athletic trainer. I lacked focus on school while I was learning my job in Public Health, and it is reflected in my grades. I was not as committed to athletic training as I had thought, but that gave me the ability to have an open mind to learn about different branches of medicine while I worked in the 4th medical group.
It was at the 4th medical group, where I had my first experience working with physician assistants while I worked in the community health, preventative health, and occupational health clinics. Each interaction I had with the team of doctors and PA was exciting for me. I loved getting to learn more about treatment plans and medicine beyond patient education. I wanted to be more emerged in the medicine and patient care. It was during this time that I made the decision to work towards becoming a PA. Shortly after making the decision to start back up with classes, I had the opportunity to become a medic. I am currently serving in this role, and it has taught me to cherish each opportunity to provide care for people and their loved ones. It has also given me an extensive skill set that allows me to provide direct patient care. In this role I have been able to dive deeper into the field of medicine and experience the high tempo environments in many different in-patient and out-patient settings.
I still crave a more profound relationship with the world of health care, much like I did for the outdoors. I want to be challenged with treatment plans and elevate my understanding of disease. I want to help patients on a more comprehensive level. The level of autonomy and the flexibility to change specialties are aspects I find appealing about the physician assistant profession because there are so many opportunities for a new challenge and skill set with in the profession. I seek the opportunities to expand my skill sets and knowledge as a health care professional and to be able to treat patients while also being a member of a collaborative team. The years I have spent working in health care have taught me how to stay focused in fast-paced environments, how to work well in a team and how much I love connecting with and helping patients.
Whitney Prosperi says
Katrina,
I think you are off to a good start.
You may want to combine your first two paragraphs, condensing where you can throughout your essay. I also think it would be helpful to learn more about your military service and how you developed qualities that will help you as a PA. Emphasizing the collaboration, leadership, and training would show some of the strengths you will bring to the role.
I would also include a patient care story that reveals some of the traits that will make you a great PA. You want to show yourself in action connecting with a patient on a personal level while providing clinical care of some kind.
Lastly, if you have any shadowing experience, describe that. What about the interactions between PA/patient or PA/supervising physician solidified your decision?
I wish you good luck, Katrina!
Mary Saul says
I saw many patients unknowingly imitating one another’s mannerisms. The emulating gestures would occasionally happen whenever the doctor had to step out of the room to obtain a scan. First, eyes would dart all around the room, similar to moving a laser to entertain a kitten. Then, the consistent tapping of their foot would then begin as they would await life-changing answers. Was their cancer benign or malignant? Did their already existing cancer metastasize? Was their regimen successful in shrinking the tumor? Did the NCCN guidelines no longer show any promising solutions after their third-line of therapy? Was hospice now their only option?
The self-caressing would begin as a way to assure themselves that they would be ok. In these instances, I could not help but engage with patients. I would comment on their outfits, the weather, or the clock in the room that seemed to tick louder than the previous encounter. Often a sense of relief would meet the patient’s face as they excitedly rambled on about anything other than their results. This observation demonstrated what I had learned in the course patient-provider interactions. Positive interactions indeed make a difference.
Giving a few minutes of relief or encouragement through patient interaction was what I began to strive for during my days as a medical oncology scribe, even after being promoted to scribe ambassador and shortly after chief scribe over oncology and urology. I would engage in active listening during encounters and stop at my desk in between to revise and finish up the patient’s notes. I was constantly multitasking, finishing notes while performing managerial duties. Patients would say, “Oh, there you are. I thought I wasn’t going to see you today.” I would smile big and nod my head as I claimed my position in the corner. Those brief moments made me feel like I was doing my part in creating a positive impact that was more than their notes that I strived to make accurate.
I had an opportunity to shadow the PA that worked with one of the oncologists. I found that she, on average, spent more time with the patients. She knew what to do in most of the patient scenarios. However, she still met with the doctor to discuss the patient’s case and learn from their expertise. I have gained similar collaborative skills as a medical scribe manager. Even though I had the power to make decisions alone, I would call meetings with my employees to get their input before making the final call. Teamwork and emphasizing the importance of every role was crucial in my job as it is in-patient care. The interactions I saw with the physician assistant intensified my goal of wanting to be in her position.
The PA Marcella Mcpeek, is now working in the ICU intensive practice at Cleveland Clinic Indian River Hospital; this epitomized the beauty of this career choice. The ability to move to different specialties throughout your life and continuing to learn and feel content. Before deciding to be a PA, I was all over the place with career choices. The journey to becoming a physician assistant has been an odyssey that led me to a content decision.
In high school, I joined Big Brother Big Sister. My “little” showed immense progression in a short span. The improvement resulted in me becoming mentor of the month. During this time, I realized the pleasure I had to influence positive change. I continued volunteering with this organization for four years. Ultimately, my partnership specialist picked me to talk to other volunteers and give a speech to the organization’s generous donors.
I thought I wanted to go in the direction of teaching. Teaching changed to an orthodontist, lawyer, pediatric nurse, and author. I distinctly remember my college advisor gazing at me as I babbled about every idea I had for myself and my future. “Mary, I am going to give you a week to narrow it down to three ideas,” she stated. After I felt I could somehow accomplish that, she added: “in the same type of career field.”
I spent the week looking into a career path and could not choose a specific career. Around this time, my brother began having health issues. I wanted to know every detail that he frustratingly decided to keep private. One day the hospital sent him home with a diagnosed cramp. My mother also dismissed the cramp and told him he should “pray about it.” I called the ambulance that night when I saw he was struggling to stand. I will never forget the physician telling my mom that my brother would have died that night had he not come in. The feeling that I had a part in saving him was captivating. I knew then that I wanted to seek a career in healthcare. Ultimately about a year later, my brother passed away. While dealing with this, I dropped some classes, and my focus was not 100%; however, I finished, transferred to the University of South Florida, and got my bachelor’s degree in Health Sciences.
While going to school, I worked two jobs and joined the national honors society of leadership and success and the USF Pre-Physician Assistant Society. I volunteered at Shriners Healthcare for Children and Trinity Café. I lived with my aunt, who slowly became addicted to Benzodiazepines. The language barriers that I have seen my family experience as Ethiopian-Americans contribute to many preventable issues. I have witnessed the baton of common preventable illnesses get passed along from generation to generation. Nonetheless, my beautiful culture has given me the patience for all accents and translators.
I had the opportunity to shadow a pediatric Hematologist/Oncologist named Dr. Dana A Obzut. The experience was not as grim as one might think. She told me that most kids that are battling cancer are survivors. This experience piqued my interest in Oncology. I applied to scribe in the emergency department and was offered the first full-time position as a medical scribe in the Oncology department.
My major in biological and social/behavioral sciences allowed me to gain perspective outside of math and science. Although those are important, what I learned in my other classes will aid me in my career. Medical sociology was a class that allowed me to be aware of the significant social constructs involved in medicine and how this may influence my patient’s choices. Patient-provider interaction was a class that taught me the bio-psycho-social model geared toward effective communication with patients. Medical ethics opened me up to possible wrongdoings that come across in the health care system. I learned about adverse childhood experiences or ACES that can lead to many issues down the line with patients. I have learned the different approaches to incorporating mental health and substance abuse services in the medical field. Working for Humana health insurance for Medicaid patients during my undergrad helped me gain a patient’s perspective when navigating through the health system regarding billing and collaborative care.
My experiences have made me adaptable, eager, and focused on patient-centered care. Since deciding this career path, I will not be content doing anything else in life. I feel equipped with compassion and respect for every race, education level, and language barrier.
Whitney Prosperi says
Mary,
You are a beautiful storyteller. I can picture the scenes you have written about as you reveal your compassion and desire to impact and elevate patients.
I think your emphasis on collaboration and teamwork is effective as this is such a crucial aspect of a PA’s role.
I imagine you are well over the character count so you will have to condense where you can.
You may want to add more detail about one of Marcella’s interactions that confirmed your decision to pursue the PA path.
I’m not saying you need this, but remember we are taking essay submissions for our revision service should you want more help.
I wish you good luck in the process, Mary.
Mary Saul says
Thank you for your feedback! I have had trouble condensing without ruining the flow of my paper. I will look into the packages! Is there any way to delete my initial comment? Also, which of the editing options would you recommend?
Ann Li says
Thank you so much for doing these edits! Hopefully you can get to mine!
I watch from my seat at the pew as my mother hugs Grandpa Leo, who breaks down crying into my mother’s arms despite being the most stoic person I know. A long line of friends and family wait behind my mother to pay their respects and to comfort him as well. My grandmother had passed away only a couple of days before, but people came from all across the nation to the funeral to show their support and love for her.
My grandma had been sick for a while before she passed. She had trouble swallowing food so the doctors put a GI tube in. The GI tube didn’t work, as the food going through the tube somehow still wasn’t being digested. The doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong with her and after weeks of scratching their heads over tests and scans that came back normal, they stopped trying. It was depressing and painful to imagine, knowing that she essentially was just slowly starving to death, and that her suffering had to be prolonged for so long before she finally succumbed. I felt so helpless during these weeks. Even though I am a biology major and was already considering a career in medicine, I had no knowledge to even attempt to try to figure out what was wrong with Grandma Hope. Logically I know that I wouldn’t have been able to find out what was wrong by myself, but the guilt and helplessness still lingered in my mind, and I wished I knew more to be able to help.
Grandma Hope was the most compassionate and giving person. My parents met her when they came to America to study, and she took them in, making sure they had everything they needed to live comfortably and providing a safe space in her home. When I was born, she became my Grandma Hope, but she has also become Grandma Hope to many other international students that she continued to help at the university. Her entire personality is to give, give, and keep giving. Once a new PhD student was sleeping on the floor of his apartment for a few weeks. Once Grandma Hope found out, he had a bed along with a dresser and a small collection of other home necessities in his apartment before the day was over. Grandma Hope has inspired me all my life to always be compassionate, and she taught me the importance of going above and beyond for others.
In my work as a CNA in the dementia unit of a nursing home, compassion is the number one characteristic needed to care for the residents. Although many of the residents are physically healthy, they still require my assistance bathing and performing daily living activities, which can be embarrassing even if they can’t properly express it. The residents often instead react with anger or violence, and because there is a disconnect between their actions and me understanding what they mean, it can be frustrating. When I first started working in the unit, one resident, Dee Dee, would always be so happy when I got her up from the dining room and led her to her room to be changed. However, whenever we entered the bathroom, it was like a switch turned on and she would immediately react negatively and try to leave the bathroom. I couldn’t understand why the bathroom would ignite such a sudden reaction, but as I tried to imagine how I might feel if I were in her shoes, I realized I would feel more than a little vulnerable and embarrassed if a virtual stranger started taking my clothes off, and I would get frustrated that I didn’t have the ability to tell them why I was upset. After this revelation, I started to make sure I constantly asked her if she was okay with what I was doing, and I also made sure I broke my steps down to her, like saying “I will take your shirt off now” instead of simply “I will wash you now.” Dee Dee became overall much less agitated, and I noticed that she seemed much more comfortable with me in settings other than the bathroom as well.
In my experience of talking to and shadowing PAs, I have seen how much empathy PAs have towards their patients and how they are willing to do anything they can to help them get better. I want to become a physician assistant so that I am able to continuously expand my knowledge of medicine and take someone’s pain away so that my patients and their families hopefully don’t have to feel the same helplessness I felt when Grandma Hope died. I realize that it is a privilege to be entrusted with someone’s wellbeing when they are vulnerable, whether it be bathing a senior resident like Dee Dee or performing surgery on a dying patient. Being a physician assistant would allow me to continue to expand my knowledge, as well as continue Grandma Hope’s legacy to give, give, and keep giving.
Whitney Prosperi says
Ann,
Your Grandma Hope sounds like such an inspiration, and I know you will honor her legacy through your work.
I think we need to hear more about what appeals to you about the PA profession. Is it the ability to spend more time building relationships with patients? The opportunity to switch specialties or increase access to care?
I would elaborate on your shadowing experience. What did you witness between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient that confirmed your decision?
I would elaborate on some of the clinical skills you have gained. You may want to mention your commitment to collaboration since this is such an integral part of the PA’s role.
I wish you good luck, Ann.
Ty says
Hello, I am in dire need to have my essay looked over so any feedback will help, thanks! – Ty
One of my earliest childhood memories was being raised in a small town in Alabama. With one major road and a super Wal-Mart, the only excitement of the town was time with family. In addition, while living in such a small town, necessary resources were unattainable or deficient, but the most concerning was the account of only one hospital. My grandmother had diabetes that required her to seek medical care often. Unfortunately, our hospital lacked the means to provide enough care. I witnessed her being transferred to Florida or Georgia for different treatments, all while experiencing prejudice for being African American and a woman. In sum, after all the travelling, different medical opinions, and medicine, nothing changed and diabetes did the inevitable. She passed away right before I graduated from college. Tragedy struck for me, but it only ignited a fire inside to be passionate about helping others in need and change the narrative of my family’s legacy regarding health. It was this event that pushed me to want to reach those who are being ignored because of their race, gender, or lack of professionals qualified in their communities and follow in the footsteps of the women in my family who all pursued the healthcare path to educate and highlight the importance of wellbeing.
Once I gained an understanding of sciences and health in high school, everything in my environment aligned with healthcare; from the classes I was taking, my interests and extracurricular activities like working under an athletic trainer, and even my surrounding people had ties to healthcare. I began my undergraduate studies at Augusta University majoring in Chemistry, but after a tough two years, I decided that the school and the major were not for me and I made some changes. Now on a fresh path, I had a better idea of what I wanted to do with my life. However, COVID begin and it put all my efforts to a halt. With the lockdown came a lack of opportunities to shadow and get experience. Troubled for some time, I felt like there were no other options until sometime later; I met an individual who was pursing the physician assistant profession. I immersed in research on the internet to further my understanding, and all the information I gathered about the profession aligned with my purpose and current attributes. Traits like teamwork and communication stood out, but especially the fact that the profession is continuously growing and bridged the gap in underserved communities; something I experienced personally. I arranged meetings with physician assistants to get a better understanding of their role and what I admired most was their commitment to medicine and teamwork with other healthcare professionals to administer the best care possible to their patients. Immediately, I knew I would fit perfectly in this profession. I began my journey earlier to apply for physician assistant school by furthering my patient care experience and taking necessary coursework I did not complete while in undergrad. Because of my financial situation, I’ve had to work full time and go to school full time, which aids in my lack of other healthcare experiences, but I have attained several attributes that I believe to be helpful in my path of being a physician assistant. Benchmark PT was the first opportunity for me to interact with patients on a professional level and administer help within my scope. My duties comprising welcoming the patients during check in and assisting them with workouts constructed by the Physical therapists. As a physical therapy technician, I enjoyed assisting the physical therapists, but my favorite part was showing the patient’s exercises and getting to know a little about them. It’s a fresh feeling when patients respect you and appreciate your efforts. I gained valuable lessons during my time, like teamwork, time management and patient interaction. However, the most valuable lesson of all was the knowledge that I touched the patients and received cards and words of encouragement. I’ve worked in several call centers, which strengthened my communication skills tremendously. I have also worked in several environments like camps, and tutoring that allowed me to work with a team and be a part of a unit. To work in those environments, it takes the ability to adapt and work efficient with different personalities and opinions, something that I have become accustomed to.
As a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Incorporated, our major purpose is to be of service and volunteer for my school and the community. One particular opportunity was when we visited Girls, Inc an organization focused on underprivileged African American girls and provided them with resources and activities that focused on self-esteem, education, and health. It was always an honor to be around the girls and help them tap into their potential of being amazing young women. This established my focus on helping women; women’s health and young girls because of the stigma that they don’t need or want help, but are often suffering the most and often ignored.
Although my grades are not perfect, I did everything I could to maintain academic success, and recognized on the dean’s list twice. I had to retake two classes, those being biology and organic chemistry. Both classes required a high level of understanding that took me some time to get to and, despite my efforts, my busy work schedule and long list of classes forced me to fall short. However, I retook the classes and got much better grades the second time around by focusing on the subjects that troubled me the most, changing my studying habits, and working on time management. If accepted, I know that whatever challenges may arise, whether academically or physically, I’m well equipped to find a solution and prevail every time.
My life experiences have pushed me to want to serve in communities where help is scarce, something that affected me directed in my community. If given the opportunity to make a change where people like me are constantly counted out, it would mean the world to not only myself, but my family. I know that I’m prepared for what’s coming with my ability to work hard and communicate effectively, and overall enthusiasm for medicine. Even with my back against the wall, my perseverance allows me to rise to any challenge and see through any obstacles, a trivial reality, but none the less rewarding at the end.
Whitney Prosperi says
Ty,
I am sorry for the unfair treatment your grandmother experienced, and I know you will honor her legacy through your service.
You are off to a good start. I would condense where you can and include a specific patient care story that shows you in action building a relationship with a patient. You want to show some of the empathy and compassion that will make you an effective PA.
Also, I would highlight any clinical skills and medical experience you have gained in your work.
I wish you good luck, Ty. I’m not saying you need this, but should you want more help we are taking submissions for our essay revision service.
Asad says
The buzzer sounds as the ball swishes through the net, the crowd erupts in excitement as Boston wins the championship. Confetti rains down, jubilance fills the arena, as I watch in awe. When I moved to the United States from Pakistan at the age of 7, basketball fascinated me. My dream was to play professionally and impact others the way basketball had impacted me. As time passed, however, my dreams changed. I defined a different way to influence the lives of others while maintaining the skills and values basketball instilled in me.
In Karachi, Pakistan, my family experienced poor living conditions due to a lack of resources. Electricity and water shortages were a common occurrence and healthcare was not readily available to struggling individuals. When my grandparents’ health deteriorated, my mother played the role of their physician. I recall the helplessness and guilt I felt as she rushed to their aid late at night by providing them insulin and managing their health. This was the root of my interest in becoming a physician assistant (PA).
In 2004, my family immigrated to the US when my parents decided to give me access to the education and healthcare they weren’t afforded in Pakistan. However, the move was not seamless. My father struggled to adapt to the American lifestyle and soon fell into a battle with depression. Overtime, I grew to empathize with him, recognizing the immense sacrifice he made, but just as a young boy in Pakistan, I felt helpless. This was a driving force in my pursuit to become a PA. In high school, I gained valuable experiences volunteering at a local hospital in the Radiology, ICU and Pediatrics departments. I found medicine fascinating, but still had a lingering hope of playing basketball. I was the captain for several teams which instilled in me the value of teamwork and leadership. Late in games, I would lead the team in making critical plays that would lead us to victory while having the aid of my coach. Similarly, as a PA I will be able to make strategic decisions to develop optimal treatment for patients autonomously but still appreciate the opportunity to collaborate with other physicians. I may have not taken off as a professional basketball player, but these skills will undoubtedly aid me in my career as a PA
During my senior year of high school, my grandfather passed away. My mental health and academics were negatively impacted as I lost sight of my goals and, unfortunately, this followed me into my first year of college. This was proceeded by a car accident, which caused me to withdraw from all of my classes. A collision turned into a wake-up call. I enrolled in a course to strengthen my time management skills to improve my study habits. Additionally, with the aid of an academic advisor, I was able to recommit myself to my education. With renewed determination, I worked assiduously to improve my GPA from a 1.8 to a 3.4, reflecting an upward trend that attests to my perseverance in my goal of becoming a PA.
Since obtaining my Bachelor’s degree, I have worked as a medical assistant at an internal medicine office where many of our patients have chronic disabilities who require precise communication to ensure their level of comfort is met. With these encounters, I have learned to be extremely patient, maintain attention to detail, and adapt to all types of situations. Through my experiences, I have had the opportunity to work with both NP’s and PA’s and understand the value they both bring to the field of healthcare. While both professions are similar they have different approaches in treating their patients. However, I am more intrigued by the medical model used by PA’s and hope to learn more from it. I believe the broader clinical foundation offered by being a PA suits me best as it will provide me with additional clinical experience and a more in-depth foundation in medicine. This appeals to me, as I hope to educate and advocate for underserved patients in rural areas, similar to those in Pakistan. I want to be a PA, as I will be able to achieve this goal by having the flexibility to adapt and transition between specialties which will strengthen my ability to provide in diverse medical environments.
Although a majority of individuals have a specific moment that sparked their desire to become a PA, my journey is a culmination of the last 15 years. As a young immigrant, I was captivated by basketball because of the team environment, strategic thinking, and most importantly the elation brought to individuals who may be struggling. Growing up in Karachi and witnessing my family’s health struggles has pushed me to pursue a career where I can assist patients in underserved areas regardless of their socioeconomic status. Through the obstacles I have faced and overcome, I have shown the resiliency and patience necessary to provide for others. In my pursuit of becoming a PA, I hope to share my knowledge and provide for my family, community, and those in need.
Whitney Prosperi says
Asad,
Your resilience shines throughout every word of your essay.
You do a good job of showing your motivation for becoming a PA.
I would suggest adding in a description of your shadowing experience if you have any. What did you witness between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient that solidified your decision?
Also, if you have a patient care story that shows you in action providing clinical care of some kind, include that. You want to reveal some of the traits you possess that will make you an effective PA.
You may need to summarize somewhat throughout your essay to fit these new paragraphs in.
I think you are wise to address your grades. If you have any “wins” you can include here, I would advise mentioning those.
Lastly, “over time” is two words. 🙂
I wish you good luck on your journey, Asad!
Abby says
This is my very first attempt so it may be rough, I am open to any and all constructive criticism. I really hope you get a chance to read, thank you!
“I was walking home from school, just like every other day, except that day was not like every other day. I opened the door to my house to see my mother and father home, unusual since they normally both would be at work. Not only that, they were crying and hugging, I knew immediately something was very wrong. They sat my sister and I down to tell us the devastating news, my mother has been diagnosed with breast cancer. My brother being too young to understand was not present for this conversation. Did they think me and my sister were old enough to understand? We were not. We knew this meant my mother was sick, but how sick? Was she going die? How are they going to fix her? What is chemotherapy? What is cancer? From then on I knew I wanted to go into the medical field. I wanted to grow up to be just like the doctors that saved my mother’s life. I wanted to have the knowledge to be able to answer these questions and more.
Now I was on the pathway to healthcare, but what health professional did I want to be exactly? I was unsure. So it was time to get as much experience in different areas as my student-athlete lifestyle allowed. One of the most influential experiences I have had was my medical internship in Thailand with the Friends for Asia Foundation. I was able to spend every day in several different areas of a hospital in a third world country, something so many individuals are not lucky enough to do. Week one, in pediatric oncology, there was a young boy with osteosarcoma who touched my heart. Obviously, there was a major language barrier between him and I, but between goofy faces and fun hand signs, I was able to put a smile on his face, and he on mine. I wanted the opportunity to be that person every day for the rest of my life, the person to put a smile on a patient’s face when they are feeling their worst. I knew I could do that, I knew with my drive and passion that I could become the medical professional with the knowledge to heal patients, make them feel better and see that smile.
After this time abroad solidified my desire to enter medicine, I found myself longing to work full time at the hospital with all the hustle and bustle and variety of medical problems to solve. It was my position as a patient care technician at St. Joseph’s Health that landed me on physician assistant. I do not know if many people can say it was one patient that was the reason they choose their career, but I can. It was on one of my night shifts that I met Mary, a women who was severely ill and confused. I was coming out of a different patient’s room to see her bed alarm going off and I took off in a sprint to get to her. I did not get there in time, she had already fallen to floor and hit her head. Alone in a hospital, scared and confused, Mary clung to me as her safety. She needed to go for a head CT but refused to go without me and would not let go of my hand the entire way there and back. I felt special, I felt needed and important, a feeling I wanted to be able to have every day. Although, once my night shift ended that morning, so did my time with Mary because I was a float, I would be placed on a different floor for my next shift. A couple weeks later, on an alternate unit I walked into a patient room and to my utterly satisfying surprise, there was Mary. She was looking and feeling so much better and even though she didn’t recognize me because of her past state of mind, I recognized her immediately. I was ecstatic to see how well she had recovered and I had only wished I could have been with her along the entire journey.
I want to become a physician assistant. I want to be with my patient from review of systems to diagnosis to treatment to recovery. I want to be the person that heals someone and is able to see that person walk out of the hospital at the end of their recovery with a smile that I put on their face. I want to be someone that patients count on and trust. I want to work within a team to problem solve and create a plan. I want all the different specialties in the palm of my hand. I want the endless opportunities being a physician assistant gives me. I want to save a young girl’s mother’s life from breast cancer. “
Whitney Prosperi says
Abby,
I can sense your longing to help patients woven throughout your essay.
You do a good job of establishing your desire to make a difference, but I think you need to address the question of why become a PA specifically. Was there a moment you discovered that position? What draws you to PA over other types of providers? (ability to switch specialties? more time/contact with patients? ability to expand care to underserved?)
Also, I would describe your shadowing experience if you have any. What about an interaction between PA/patient or PA/supervising physician solidified your decision?
I wish you good luck in this process, Abby.
Elijah Jones says
Deciding to become a physician assistant (PA) allows me to combine my strong interest in medicine and passion for working with patients into an amazing career as a healthcare provider. Hearing about this profession from a mentor in high school nurtured countless daydreams about being a compassionate and understanding PA who put patients first. Bringing my dream into reality it would mean staying determined, focused, and working harder than ever before to overcome any and every obstacle on this journey. To do so meant finding the best opportunities that allow me to develop academically, professionally, and personally.
To get exposure to working with patients I began volunteering at a veterans’ community living center in Queens NY as a member of the activities committee, planning different interactive events for the older veterans/patients. This opportunity increased my comfort level when working with veterans/patients, but l wanted a bigger role where I could advocate and help patients voice their concerns. Working at Bellevue’s Hospital’s Emergency Service as a Patient Advocacy Volunteer allowed me to serve as a liaison between patients and the clinical teams within the urgent care, pediatric, and adult emergency service while providing emotional support during their visit. I loved working with patients who were from medically underserved areas and were seen to help themselves or their family members. By actively engaging patients and their family members via listening to their concerns, I was able to introduce them to programs at the institution that fit their needs. Learning how to provide a pleasant experience to patients’ unfavorable situations increased my capacity to be compassionate and understanding towards patients.
Being able to connect and help patients as a volunteer provided the foundation to the PA I want to become. As a PA I want to display empathy and provide a safe space for the patients I’m treating as this experience can shape and influence their view on healthcare. Understanding how healthcare and overall wellness are such malleable concepts shaped by one’s circumstance, access to care, and past experiences drove me to seek clinical experience as a Care Coordinator at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center.
Being a Care Coordinator II involves managing high-patient volume clinics and alternating between chemotherapy suites, surgery, and medical oncology practices. To be successful within this role I’ve established clear and effective communication with clinical staff, employed multiple workflows for maintaining providers’ templates and clinic schedules and utilized critical thinking skills to complete numerous tasks. This position grants me a role on a clinical team and provides a look at how collaborative medicine truly is. Collaborating with phlebotomists, patient care technicians, nurses, nurse practitioners, PA’s, and physicians at an outpatient center showcased the importance of team-based medicine to ensure patients receive quality care.
Working alongside PAs allowed me to network and shadow within multiple services, increasing my understanding of the PA role. Each PA I shadowed had prior experience in various specialties that allowed them to recognize a variety of issues. I was enamored at the level of knowledge and experience inpatient and outpatient PA’s presented during patient assessments. PA’s performed many outpatient procedures as well as assisted in surgeries, highlighting the duality of this profession’s role on a clinical team. Seeing a range in independence for responsibilities showcased how the PA role has grown within medicine. Experiencing challenging clinic situations as Care coordinator II allowed me to become more versatile, flexible, and team orientated to ensure patients received excellent care. These characteristics are parallel to those utilized by PAs to carry out their role and treat patients. Seeing the correlation helped to strengthen my resolve towards accomplishing my goal of becoming a PA.
Accomplishing my goal meant humbling myself and becoming a student again to raise my GPA. The upward trend in science course grades on my transcript was overshadowed by the low science prereq grades, the result of poor time management and immaturity. It was easier to succumb to the fear of failure during undergrad and that led me to be over with just getting a good enough grade without completely trying. Retaking prerequisite classes during the covid 19 pandemic forced me to make the proper adjustments such as allocating the proper time to understanding and applying the material towards study modules for quizzes and exams. Doing this allowed me to retain more information and gave me the confidence needed to trust myself and fully commit to doing the best I can. Although working full time, I was able to receive an A in all courses retaken highlight my ever-growing capacity for growth as a student.
My years between undergraduate education and being in the workforce provided a space to allow growth and gain clarity on my decision to become a PA. With each experience I’ve become more intuitive, more compassionate, and most importantly more understanding; characteristics that will allow me to accel as a future PA. Becoming a PA is the short-term goal, the long-term goal is to use this opportunity to help engage and educate those who live within medically underserved communities like the one I currently live in. My interest in becoming a PA is due to the positive outcomes that will occur from being in a position that’s able to make a difference. Some people may not view using their position to help others in life, but it was the late Kobe Bryant who said “We can always be average and do what’s normal. I’m not in this to do what’s normal”.
Whitney Prosperi says
Elijah,
You are off to a good start. I think you do a good job of showing your passion for helping people and your desire for collaboration.
You may want to include a more compelling opening. Describe an interaction with a patient that shows some of the traits you possess that will make you an exceptional PA. Show yourself in action, connecting with a patient on a human level, as well as your desire to do more for patients.
I would also elaborate on your shadowing experiences. Is there an interaction you witnessed between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient that confirmed your decision?
I wish you good luck in the process.
Emillie Partridge says
This essay has been the hardest part of my application as I am not generally one who talks about themselves, so all constructive criticism is welcome!
“A simple smile. That’s the start of opening your heart and being compassionate to others,” the Dalai Lama stated. Compassion, empathy, integrity, and a passion for learning are some of the few attributes one must possess to be a good healthcare provider. I strive to maintain these qualities every day so I can become a great PA. My life experiences, countless hours of researching the PA profession, and working as part of a healthcare team have all lead me down the path to PA school.
I always try to talk with my patients to keep them comfortable when the physician steps out of the room for a moment. “You know, my grandmothers name was Mildred too, but everyone called her Millie. That’s where my name came from; you put an E on it and that makes Emillie.” Mildred and I became good friends in that moment. Mildred did not drive anymore, so her son brought her into the office every 3 months to have her implantable cardioverter defibrillator (ICD) interrogated. She had a fiery personality and kept everyone on their toes. I knew Mildred for about 2 years when Dr. Baig moved out of state, and I grew sad thinking I would not see Mildred anymore. One day, I saw Mildred’s name on another physicians schedule whom I work with, and was so ecstatic to see her again. When me and the doctor walked into her room, Mildred’s face lit up and her son said, ”Emillie? I thought that was your smile behind the mask, it’s so good to see a friendly face!”. Mildred did not talk as much as she usually did and seemed a little thinner. The last ICD interrogation appeared normal, but her demeanor was all-telling. At the end of the visit her son came up to me and said, “Mom hasn’t been doing as well recently, and was very nervous to come into a new office today. It made her feel more comfortable to see a familiar face.” The corner of her eyes crinkled, this was the first time I had seen her smile today. “It was great to see you both too!” I replied. That was the last time I ever saw Mildred.
This interaction with Mildred made me realize one of my biggest goals of becoming a PA; making an office visit less intimidating and more comfortable for patients. A little compassion and a smile go a long way in making people feel more comfortable. I have heard patients too many times say “thank you for actually taking the time to listen to my concerns” to the physicians and PAs I work alongside. Making a patient feel truly heard is a crucial aspect of patient-centered care. My experiences as a scribe have taught me to observe and engage with others, so they feel I am listening. When I was little I remember other children being afraid to go to the doctor and I never understood why. We know this fear of “the doctors office” can even transfer into adulthood as is evident in patients with white coat hypertension. My last experience with Mildred especially stuck with me, because I realized I have already started to achieve my goal of making patients feel more comfortable and at ease in a healthcare setting. I want to do more though, including diagnosing and treating patients which lead me to the PA profession.
A drive and passion for lifelong learning are important in any aspect of the healthcare field. I love my job as a medical scribe because I learn something new every day. If I see an EKG abnormality or term that I am unfamiliar with, I will learn more about it from the physician I am working with as well as do some of my own research. I have a curious personality and made a commitment to learning at a young age. In grade school I was placed in the advanced program starting in third grade. I went on to take AP classes in high school and took anatomy my senior year which solidified my interest in healthcare. I went on to join the honors program at Wright Stat, then got a job as a medical scribe just before graduating to explore my options for careers in the healthcare field.
Working alongside PAs, Physicians, MAs, RNs, scribes, and other supporting office staff every day has given me a strong knowledge of the duties of each team member. When I shadowed a PA I work with, Jake Sillaman, I learned that he had a lighter patient schedule than some of the Doctors which allowed him to spend more time with each patient. I used to be certain I wanted to work in primary care but working in a cardiologist’s office for 4 years has piqued my interest in exploring other specialties. The lateral mobility between specialties is one of the many motivating factors to choose the PA profession. I have used an assembly line simile to describe how our office works to many patients. Each person has certain duties they perform, and we all work together to give patients the best care possible. Teamwork not only makes things run more efficiently, but having multiple perspectives is always beneficial. The collaborative nature of the PA profession as well as all other aspects I have discussed align with exactly what I want out of my career.
Whitney Prosperi says
Emillie,
Your story about Millie shows your ability to connect and reassure patients. You may consider moving this to become your introduction.
I would include more details from what you observed in your shadowing experiences. What did you witness between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient that confirmed your decision?
You may need to condense elsewhere to add this.
For your conclusion, I would reiterate your desire to have advanced responsibility for patient care and tie back to your introduction in some way.
Good luck to you!
Kathryn Paturzo says
When you ask anyone who wants to become a physician assistant why they want to be a PA, the heart of their answer is always the same: they want to help people. What sets each of us apart is the question of how we want to help. I’ve always known I want to help people, but I’ve spent the past four years taking advantage of every opportunity to help me figure out my how. I know now that I want to help by working as a member of a team of talented and dedicated providers to ensure that our patients receive the best care possible. I want to work with medically underserved populations and provide excellent care that is accessible and affordable to all who need it. I want to spend meaningful time with my patients and have a lasting impact in their lives. Over the past four years I have cultivated my passions, strengthened my skills as a provider, and determined that a career as a PA is the one I want to pursue.
In summer 2019 I began my path to becoming a PA and became certified as an EMT. During my first patient contact experience, my patient had lacerated an artery in their lower arm. I was absolutely terrified, but from the moment I was handed a tourniquet and asked to step up as the primary caregiver, I was hooked and knew that this was where I belonged. This experience gave me my first glimpse at how providers work as a team, encouraging each other and working together to make sure the patient is receiving the highest quality care. As a PA, I will work in situations like this, where each provider will have their specific role with the patient, however we will still work together as a unit.
During the 2020-2021 academic year, I struggled to find opportunities to put my skills to use and work with patients. In April 2021, I had the opportunity to give back to my community by administering COVID-19 vaccines through Elon University. Once I began administering vaccines, I learned that my job was much more than just giving a shot. My job was to educate patients about the risks and benefits of the vaccine, to make meaningful connections with them, and to go at their pace and respect all decisions they were making. This is when I realized my passion for patient education and making sure that my patients felt safe and informed about their medical decisions. The heartfelt thanks I received from patients further solidified that I wanted a career as a PA where I could help educate patients and contribute to their sense of autonomy when receiving medical care.
When I joined the Rehoboth Beach Patrol as an EMT, I became part of a team that worked seamlessly together, and was able to step up to become a leader of this team. Most days I worked independently and relied on my training to make informed medical decisions without the input of a partner. This experience has given me tremendous confidence as a provider and has given me decision making skills that I will use when working independently with my patients as a PA. For example, a man was trying to get out of the ocean, fell, and hit his head, feeling himself lose muscle control from the neck down. When I arrived on scene I immediately took charge, assigning tasks to each of the guards present, administering patient care, and preparing the patient for medevac transport. One week after this incident, I received a phone call from the patients’ wife thanking me for what I had done to help her husband and informing me of his progress in recovery, telling me that his team of providers was confident that he would walk again. My ability to make meaningful connections with my patients is something that I am proud of as a provider and a skill that I will continue to foster as a PA. This moment solidified my desire to be part of a team of providers that make a difference in their patient’s lives.
In addition to these experiences my desire to become a PA has been influenced by those that I have shadowed, specifically Emily and Lindsey. Emily modeled the importance of treating all patients with empathy, patience, and respect. Lindsey taught me the importance of using shared decision making with her patients. Both women showed me that being a PA is more than just taking care of your patient’s ailment: it is caring for your patient as a whole person. By taking extra time with their patients, making personal connections with them, and making sure they were always safe and comfortable, these women modeled how I want to care for my patients in the future.
It is through my patient care experiences and experience shadowing PA’s that I have determined not only why I want to be a PA, but how. My ability to communicate and make personal connections with patients, work efficiently with others during rapidly changing situations, and my desire to help others are all qualities that will make me an excellent PA. The small impact that I have had on my patients lives as an EMT has driven me towards a career where I will continue to do so for more patients and their families.
Whitney Prosperi says
Kathryn,
You are off to a very good start.
I especially think your patient care story shows your ability to remain calm, provide care, and connect with patients on a personal level.
You may consider flipping your first and second paragraphs. This would be a good way to capture the reader’s attention early on in your essay.
I would also elaborate more on some other aspects that draw you to the profession. (more time with patients, ability to change specialties, increasing access to care) You may need to condense somewhat to include these new elements. I wish you good luck, Kathryn!
Katie says
Prompt: Based on your interest and prior experiences, describe how you will contribute to the improvement of healthcare in Nevada. (1500)
I grew up in an underprivileged community in a household that was very poor. My family could not afford to pay for health insurance and many other things, such as school lunches or extracurricular activity fees. However, when I was a young girl, my family was lucky enough to meet a family doctor who went out of his way numerous times to help us, such as seeing me and my siblings for medical appointments at heavily discounted rates.
The impact this doctor had on me was tremendous. In a way, he was like a superhero to me and, with his advocacy, I decided I wanted to become a physician assistant. Twenty years later, as I consider my future medical path, I know I want to help underprivileged American communities, like mine, as much as possible. By providing medical care to these communities, I hope to advocate for these youths and help them understand that they can also succeed in their career dreams if they are focused and dedicated.
As all individuals’ journeys are unique, mine is also notable for being atypical due to the personal, social, academic, financial, and professional obstacles I have faced. Work, life, school, and mental health maintenance and balance is something that took time for me to learn. Coming from an environment high in stress I naturally thrive under pressure, however bodybuilding and growing spiritually has helped my stress to be positive. I am understanding of adversity and hope to create awareness in the program and community on recognizing individuals’ struggles and promoting attention and care to mental health. My humble mindset and personality will also be contributory to the variety of student perspectives in PA school.
During my time as a medical sales representative in orthopedics and as a Mako robotics specialist with Stryker, I was a key player with multiple surgical teams across the Mid-Atlantic region that performed life-changing procedures and operations on patients. The time I spent in these roles allowed me to build the foundation of my understanding of the synergy that must be present in the operating room, as well as learn the importance of maintaining the sterile field. I was incredibly privileged to be a part of these teams and witness how the medical providers relied on each other to get the job done. I have also been fortunate enough in other professions to see and recognize how a team is only as strong as the weakest link. Strong work ethics combined with inspiring and motivational team members is the closest thing to an unstoppable force. The overall professionalism and dependability of the medical teams that I have been a part of have been one of the key driving factors for me to become a PA. The PAs that I have worked with are all at the forefront of patient care, they not only provide treatment but also promote healthy lifestyles, and educate the community.
Through my previous community involvement, I am a steward of service with willingness to help anyone in need, therefore my teamwork skills will be incorporated with enthusiasm as a student surrounded by classmates and faculty. I also have a desire to serve underprivileged populations and can provide ideas and initiative to serve the community in and around Reno, Nevada. I hope to volunteer my time to help the local community and represent the school in a positive way while increasing awareness about the PA profession. As a proactive and enthusiastic individual with high standards in education and service to others, I would be an ideal candidate for The University of Nevada-Reno PA Program.
Reflecting, I know I would not be the strong, independent woman I am today without also experiencing the struggles and hardships of my past. I am proud of my accomplishments and tenacity. I will take this go-getter attitude with me to the University of Nevada at Reno as I pursue my medical-school education and my dreams of becoming a physician assistant.
(SOS I have written 5 versions of this and am so stuck on this)
Whitney Prosperi says
Katie,
You should be proud of yourself for your resilience and determination.
You do a good job of showing your commitment to teamwork.
If you have a brief personal story that shows you connecting with someone you have encountered in your community service I think that would be effective. You want to show some of those traits that will make you an outstanding PA.
I wish you good luck, Katie!
Zach says
In fall of 2012 I was 19 years old studying chemistry pre-med at Case Western Reserve University. One night, I started experiencing back pain that increased in severity until it was debilitating. I called the campus volunteer EMS service where I worked as an EMT with to take me to the emergency department. I had a spinal fusion to correct scoliosis 6 years earlier so the ED doctors said it was most likely a loose screw. I was discharged with orders to follow up with my orthopedic surgeon. However, I started experiencing urinary symptoms with my back pain. This raised a red flag to mom and grandma who are both nurses and we went back to the ED where I was admitted. They operated and removed a screw. When I woke up from surgery, the resident was checking my motor, sensory and pulse function in my extremities when we noticed that I had no motor or sensory function below my knee. I’ll never forget the look of horror on his face.
For a couple weeks, I was bed-ridden and did not know if I would ever walk again. I developed blood clots from being sedentary and was put on a blood thinner. A CT myelogram showed a narrowing of my spinal cord. They found that my blood had reacted with the hardware and formed a viscous metallic fluid that had shifted and pressed down on my spinal cord. They removed all of the hardware and built up fluid and my symptoms improved. I learned to walk again over 6 months from wheelchair to walker to crutches with physical therapy. I had toxically high chromium levels for years but eventually I completely recovered.
I believe I will be an excellent PA because I know what it’s like to be a patient. Recently, I had a patient in the ED where I am a tech present with back pain. He had eloped from the ED the night before but returned after developing urinary symptoms and leg numbness. We immediately recognized the threat to his spinal cord and called the MRI tech in early to scan him. While doing his EKG I remembered what it was like to have that sense of dread and uncertainty. He ended up having a cavernous malformation and likely would not recover the use of his legs. I’m grateful that I did. He’s one of several patients I have had that I will not ever forget.
I will be an excellent PA because I love to learn. I know that medicine is always changing and I will always be improving my practice. While working in the ED I downloaded flash cards that medical students use for basic medicine and started studying them every shift. It has been extremely valuable to have what I’m learning be in front of me. I plan to do something similar as a practicing PA. I also know I will be an excellent PA because I understand that the role requires that I ask for help from the attending when I need it. I regularly ask doctors, nurses and PA’s about things. I think that you can learn something from everyone.
My grandma suggested that I become a PA when I was uncertain of what direction to go. I had heard of them from my orthopedic surgeon years earlier but I did not really understand the role. I went home and did my research and realized I had found my solution. I wanted to be a physician but did not want to endure the years of stress and debt. I had already accrued more debt than I was comfortable with from my undergraduate degree. I liked the autonomy but also having someone I can turn to when I don’t know something. I considered nursing school but I didn’t want a second bachelor’s and I do like the bedside but my skills will be best utilized as a provider. I could have done nursing then gone on to be a nurse practitioner but I strongly prefer the education provided by PA programs. So once I decided on PA, I went back to school and took my prerequisites. All of my last 40 credit hours have been A’s except for one B. Some semesters in my academic career I did not perform well due to living on my own and supporting myself, focusing on work instead of school, starting a business, and changing my major many times. But I am confident that the person I am now will be successful in PA school.
When I knew I wanted to be a PA, I recertified as an EMT and started working at a freestanding ED as a tech. I do blood draws, EKG’s, fiberglass splinting, COVID, flu and strep throat testing, CPR and insert foley and straight catheters as well as page physicians, arrange transport for patients and activate STEMI/stroke teams. I also assist providers and nurses with more advanced procedures like suturing, lumbar punctures, central line insertion and NG tube placement. I sit at a small nurse’s station with 4 nurses, an attending physician, resident physician and a PA or NP. I have had the opportunity to get to know them intimately and they have provided invaluable guidance for me. I worked with them through COVID and some I consider to be family. My letters of recommendation are from them and they will agree that I will be an excellent PA and that the profession is right for me.
Whitney Prosperi says
Zach,
Your passion for the profession shines through your words. I would suggest focusing more on what specifically appeals to you about the PA profession. You want to make sure you answer this prompt thoroughly. (more time/connection with patients, working with a supervising physician and healthcare team, expanding access to care for the underserved?)
I would also not waste the characters talking about considering other paths such as nurse or NP.
For your story about the patient in the ED can you expand this somewhat to show yourself in action performing some clinical skill and also connecting on a human level? You want to show some of the traits you will offer as a future PA.
If you have any shadowing experience I would describe that. What did you witness in patient/PA or supervising physician/PA interactions that solidified your decision?
Lastly, for your conclusion, I would tie back to your introduction in some way.
I wish you good luck, Zach!
Briana Neumann says
My journey to PA school began in the summer of 2018, after working as a patient sitter at Henry Ford Hospital. At this time, I was 24 years old, and attending Macomb Community College as a part-time student. My major was undeclared, but I knew I had a love for medicine and patient care. I had taken the elevator to the parking lot, when a woman with a white lab coat entered the elevator behind me; I assumed she was a physician. I had always looked up to physicians but felt that my age and socioeconomic status was ultimately preventing me from going to medical school. She noticed that my scrubs were tan colored, which was the color code for patient sitter, and asked me if I was a pre-medical student. I replied, “oh gosh no, I am way too old to go to medical school!” She continued to tell me story of how she became a physician assistant. It was this story that commenced my journey to PA school.
She had worked as a physical therapy assistant to support her four kids. It was while she was in her 40’s when she had decided she needed a change. Working alongside physician’s in the hospital had been fueling her desire not only to assist in treating patients, but to diagnose them as well. She enjoyed the fluidity of her training as a PA, and the opportunity to assist in many domains of medicine excited her. Listening to her explain her role in a patient’s medical care was inspiring. I was instantly attracted to the role of a physician assistant and was eager to learn more.
While completing my undergraduate degree, I accepted the role of a medical assistant for an orthopedic hand surgeon. At this practice I began expanding my skills with hands-on patient care. This job allowed me the ability to utilize everything I was learning in the classrooms at Macomb Community College and Oakland University, while exposing my passion for connecting with patients. I was able to treat patients from as young as 3, and up to 99 years of age. This truly made every day, a new challenge. In that small office, I witnessed a true team approach to healthcare with medical assistants, a PA and a surgeon all working together for a seamless patient experience.
During the last year, with only a handful of courses left to be completed, I made the decision to accept my most recent positions of dietitian and receptionist at the Endocrine and Metabolic Disorder center.
“Can you make sure my next appointment is with doctor Verma only,” whispers Sharon. Certified Physician Assistant, Faiza Khan, had just finished a routine diabetic appointment. When I asked Sharon if everything went okay in the room she replies, “Oh yes! I just prefer to see a real medical doctor for my appointments. What does PA-C stand for anyways?”
“Is Dr. Verma coming in for the appointment? I am not paying unless I see the doctor!” says David. “Yes, he will be here after I complete your history, I can also take care of any medication questions you have while we wait,” replied Faiza politely. Dr. Verma was stuck with a complicated adrenal adenoma case. Faiza went in to start David’s appointment so he would not be left waiting past his appointment time.
“You are an angel sent from heaven!” exclaims Mary, as she clutches PA-C Nafisa’s hand. Mary had been having a challenging time with unexplained fatigue, weight gain and hair loss, every specialist she tried calling was booked out for months. Our office was able to see her in a matter of days by utilizing an appointment with one of the certified physician assistants. Mary has never had an appointment with the physician because she does not want one. She feels comfortable under Nafisa’s care and understands that our providers work together with the doctors to supply the best care for her hypothyroidism.
As a receptionist, I encounter almost 75 patients a day. Most are like Mary, they appreciate the flexibility when booking their appointments, and extra time they receive when seeing a PA. But others have the same view as David and Sharon. They do not know what a PA is, or why they are being seen by one at their appointment. I feel slightly defeated when patient’s do not understand or recognize the benefits of seeing a PA for their appointments. Getting into conversations with Faiza and Nafisa has helped me understand the PA profession immensely. They remain confident that they can supply compassionate and accessible healthcare to their community through a team-based approach as physician assistants.
My degree completion has been far from linear; but I am certain the extra time I have taken has only strengthened my certainty on becoming a PA. As an independent student, full-time work often took priority over my education as my early course work exhibits. Yet, working up to three jobs at a time in various fields, has taught me the importance of patience, professionalism, and compassion. In 2018, with the support of my family, I was able to focus on my education, and made the decision to work towards becoming a physician assistant full-time. With improved study habits and the financial support of FASFA, I am completing my degree in Health Science with a Pre-Professional Concentration with much higher marks than before.
In the future, I plan on working as a primary care provider in rural medicine. Growing up with grandparents that lived in a rural area of Michigan, I learned as quick as papa falling on the front steps, that healthcare is not always a short trip across town. If my grandparents ever were to require serious medical attention, the nearest hospital is 1 hour away and they often travel further to see various providers for their chronic conditions. PA’s have the unique opportunity as mid-level providers to offer their services for a wider scope of conditions, and for a fraction of the cost. I am confident that my past experiences, coordinating with my strong dedication to closing the gaps that currently exist in healthcare, have molded an incredibly solid foundation to build a successful and passionate future in this profession.
Whitney Prosperi says
Briana,
You are off to a good start.
Your explanation of how you discovered the PA profession is effective.
I would suggest condensing some throughout your essay so you have room to add a few elements.
If you have any shadowing experience, I would describe that. What about interactions you witnessed confirmed your decision to pursue this path?
I would also include a patient care story that shows you in action providing clinical care of some kind while connecting on a human level. You want to show what you have to offer as a future PA.
You are wise to address your grade issues and also show the growth you have made.
One note: there is no apostrophe in this use of the word physicians.
I’m not saying you need this, but should you want more help we are taking submissions for our essay revision service.
I wish you good luck, Briana.
aatiqa noman says
The story of Goldilocks and the three bears is the perfect reflection of how I chose the career that was “Just Right” for me. I went into college being a little overwhelmed yet excited to find the perfect career. My search started off as a medical assistant at a maternity clinic. I was able to assist the gynecologist during dilation and curettage procedures, perform ultrasounds as well as monitor patients post procedures. It was an excellent learning experience however the hours I spent working and commuting started coinciding with my grades soI had to part from that job.
I looked for ways to broaden my experiences and landed at the West Suburban Rehabilitation center as an activity aide for dementia patients. My first day, I went around introducing myself but little did I know I would be introducing myself every morning. Even though the patients didn’t remember me I strived to make a positive impact in their lives. However, one patient in particular left a lasting mark in my life. The first time I met him I greeted him in Hindi and he held my hand very tightly and kissed it. My heart melted. I later found out he had no family and no one could translate for him so he chose to say quiet. He would smile every morning when he saw me and say “Meri Beti” meaning my daughter. As the language gap was bridged, I was able to convey his medical needs to the nurses. I would ask him if he was in pain and he would nod yes and point to where the pain was. This small interaction made all the difference in the world. My medical translating experience from a prior position transferred over and I often became his point of reference. I spent my time with 30 residents checking their vitals, exercising with them and often accompanying them to their annual checkups. This led to the opportunity to shadow a wide range of medical professionals such a podiatrists, physical therapists and speech therapists. While I learned something new from each experience, I was still on my quest to find the career that was “Just right” for me.
Before I knew it, graduation was around the corner. As I sat in my room decorating my graduation cap I received a call from my mother. “Aatiqa, Nana is in the hospital. Please come quickly!” I got the dreadful news of my grandfathers cancer recurrence. He was admitted to the hospital for further treatment. I started spending at least 3 nights a week with him where I got to see the healthcare team in action. While each person on this team was essential, the physician associate stood out to me the most. She spent a remarkable amount of time with him and managed his entire care plan. Not only did she provide exceptional care, but also emotional support. I noticed that she had built remarkable connections with all of her patients and this reminded me of the connections I had built at the Rehabilitation center. She went above and beyond to not only care for her patients’ illness but also their happiness. That day I knew I wanted to be that support for someone else one day.
I went on to virtually speaking with physician associates through social media platforms to learn about the career in more detail since Covid-19 had restricted my ability to shadow in person. I have made it a part of my routine to speak to at least one Physician associate a week to enhance my knowledge of this career. I have found a career path that is “just right” for me but unlike Goldilocks I am ready to overcome any bears that come in my way.
Whitney Prosperi says
Aatiqa,
You do a good job in your patient care story. This shows your ability to connect with patients on a human level. You may even want to add a line here that mentions how you desired the ability to do more for this patient and patients in general.
I would suggest condensing where you can so you can add in more details about what specifically draws you to the PA profession. (more time/contact with patients, ability to switch specialties, expanding access to care, working with a healthcare team and a supervising physician?)
Also, in your section about virtual shadowing explain what about these interactions confirmed your decision to pursue the PA profession.
Where possible, make sure you spotlight your medical experience and clinical skills.
I am not saying you need this, but remember we are taking submissions for our essay revision service should you want more help.
Good luck to you, Aatiqa.
Erik Moyanmakl says
Thank you in advance for reviewing my essay!
When I was 12 years old, I was awaiting the birth of my youngest brother and was excited to have another sibling. On the day he was born excitement turned into worry as he was rushed to the NICU with a IVH, or an intraventricular hemorrhage, which led to hydrocephalus. From that moment, I was unable to see him for around 2-3 weeks. It was decided that he required a VP shunt placement and our family had weeks of worry and turmoil leading up to the surgery. What I did notice at the hospital was how the physicians and PA’s treated and took care of him, frequently visiting my parents and reassuring them. The PA’s would spent longer amounts of time with them and would always take time with my family and the more I saw this, the more enamored I became with this career. Long story short, he went into surgery, which the doctors and PA’s helped in, and has since recovered through rehab and neurosurgery visits to be a healthy, lively 11 year old now. This experience shaped the decisions for me pursuing PA school because as a young 12-year-old, seeing the care the PA’s provided for my family during that rough stretch helped my family and me through that tough time, and in my eyes at the time, they were my superheroes for helping my brother.
As I entered college, I took general pre-med classes at UIC and was not entirely sure if that was the right fit. When I shadowed an ER doctor my sophomore year, I ran across PA’s in the ER and noticed the longer amounts of time they spent with patients and realized that they could change specialties. Throughout college, I was able to work at a physical therapy clinic, Athletico, and my desire to help others through healthcare increased. To be around different types of people of varying ages, lifestyles, and cultures was fascinating. The best part was whenever they finished up therapy and would come over to thank me for helping them, with some giving me presents or hugs. It taught me how to treat people as people, as funny as it sounds because we can get caught up in so many things that we forget to see them as people. My exposure to PA profession drove me to change my career path to Pre PA as I wanted a career that would let me make an impact on other people’s lives and allow me to challenge myself in a variety of specialties. I started to piece together that PA was the right route for me to take in the healthcare world.
As I learned more about this profession, I saw my life’s purpose through this career. When I view a PA, I see an effective communicator with strong teamwork skills, who can be efficient in many subsections of medicine. Working and volunteering in various areas of healthcare from hospitals to physical therapy clinics, I’ve developed strong communication skills and teamwork abilities along the way. For example, working in a physical therapy outpatient clinic, I have learned how to work cohesively with my other associates and have developed communication skills by learning how to deal with various types of patients with different personalities. To me these two skills are the most important a PA can have, and my healthcare experiences have led me to develop in those areas. When I view a PA, I see someone who is an effective communicator with strong teamwork skills, who can be a leader and advocate for good health which is what I am to be.
During my sophomore year, I made mistakes that have caused to have lackluster grades. These are all my mistakes and I take full accountability for them. I joined a dance team my sophomore year and made the choice to take difficult classes even with my advisor’s warnings. I wanted to challenge myself without knowing my limits and did not seek help because I felt I needed to get myself out of that situation. The combination of late practices, and being a commuter affected my early morning classes, and took a toll. My grades dipped and I had to reorganize my priorities and improve myself quickly. Afterwards, in my junior and senior year I had an upward trend in grades and finished off on a positive note. Despite the negative results, in some ways I am glad it happened because I realized the deficiencies I had, how to have better time management, and improve myself as an individual.
I also applied for the 2020-2021 cycle and did not get in. Even with this setback, it furthered my passion and I worked even harder to improve myself. I worked more as a Rehab Aide and gained lessons in managing a multitude of patients at once while improving my leadership qualities by taking younger aides under my wing and directing them during work. Furthermore, I shadowed multiple PA’s: one of whom worked in Orthopedic and Rheumatology sector of a hospital and the other who worked in an outpatient primary care setting. Both experiences allowed me to see the interactions with co-workers and patients and how each one managed different types of people, some of whom were harder to deal than others. I have realized that this is what I want to do, and furthermore this resolves my desire to become a PA.
I have been known to be compassionate, helpful, intrinsic, and a people’s person which would help me in this career. I chose this profession to be part of a team where I can live my purpose of helping others and will continue to fight to help my dreams of becoming a PA be a reality. I hope that schools will be able to see past my pedestrian GPA and give me a chance after seeing the changes I have made the last two years. With these experiences, I hope to be able to pursue my desire of becoming a Physician Assistant to be able to work in an environment where I can make a positive impact in the lives of other people through my values, demeanor, and expertise.
Excel Emmanuel Yeinaya Ali says
It is interesting how past experiences have inevitable roles in our lives that we cannot do away with, either positively or negatively, but can be motivation enough to add value to our lives. It is true as clearly stated by Dr. Myles Munroe, of blessed memory; “It is better to be dead and not know life than to be alive and not know why”. All through Childhood, for as long as I can remember due to ministry in the Assemblies of God Church, my family [of eight (8) presently; i.e., Dad, mom, myself, four (4) other boys and a little princess] has been moving from town to town, place to place, community to community; touching lives from a spiritual perspective and tending to the ‘flock’ as the good book would put it. The joyous moments coupled with the bitter ones, altogether, have made it possible, by experiential relevance, for the quick growth of my father’s ministry; interacting with different people ethnically, socially, racially, etc. I very well remember and still see the joyous countenance of all who had and have their situations attended to, the zeal with which they gave and give testimonies on account of what the Lord had done for them and continues to do through my Dad’s ministry.
It is true then that the measure of one’s impact-regardless of background, setting and socialization- is determined by; the positive contribution they have made to society, not as a cooperate entity, but at individual levels and the number of lives that have been transformed. Seeing Mrs. Georgiet across the table in the consulting room with her demeanor clearly indicative of pain, anger and bitterness from her presenting complaints of lower abdominal pain and fever coupled with low quality reception at the O.P.D during one of my vacation clinical attachments at the Bono Regional Hospital, Sunyani, Ghana as a college student enrolled in B.Sc. physician assistantship and in my third year, I sought to quickly attend to her within the shortest possible time to make up for the previous lapses at the O.P.D. Little did I know that in taking her history, there were so many loose ends that led me to the wrong diagnosis of a Urinary Tract Infection instead of a pelvic inflammatory Disease, later discovered by the supervising medical officer. I was scolded enough to make resolutions [but lucky though that there were neither pre- nor post-treatment complications]. The patient was disappointed, I was embarrassed about and ashamed of my lack of clinical judgement which was no fault of mine but of my foundational training environment that lacked enough resources, yet not an excuse at the expense of human life. The aforementioned events and happenings gave me a strong motivation to pursue purpose and to seek to touch lives and bring healing to souls not only spiritually but holistically and Healthwise for that matter, yet impossible without proper skill acquisition and specified training in a resourceful environment. The passion alone would not be enough. I applied to the Kintampo College of Health and Well-Being after Senior High School motivated by my Dad’s ministry-prior the encounter with the patient earlier described- and the fact that he said I would say as a kid; “I will be a doctor in the future”. I researched and realized that I could still achieve the dream of being a clinician, despite my inability to meet the standard grade requirements for entering medical school in Ghana; by entering a college that trains physician assistants. Diligent research opened my eyes to the PA world where I realized “oh! so I can actually work as ‘mini doctor’ and under the supervision of a medical doctor, carry out all the duties of a clinician within my designated scope of work”. That I would be able to prescribe, take patient history, perform physical examinations, suture minor wounds and even some major lacerations, possibly conduct minor surgeries under supervision-although less probable- and join in during ward rounds, gave me an even stronger drive to pursue the program and hence my application to your honorable institution. My encounter with Mrs. Georgiet amongst other encounters not comparable, reminds me of the possibility of excellence in any area of interest and going forward, I see myself in a new place of professional accuracy as a physician assisatant.
My perception was changed for these few years on campus through further clinical attachments , internal practicums and each time I have had the opportunity to provide healthcare to patients, I have regained a piece of that possibility for excell ence. I believe ; to be a part of a person’s day is a wonderful blessing. Truthfully speaking, there are many pleasurable things I could set my mind on to explore, but I am yet , to find one that would so intrigue me as being the source of someone’s wholeness a physician assistant . If there is any dream worth pursuing , I choose this. through quality healthcare Thank
Whitney Prosperi says
Excel,
Your passion to elevate others is revealed throughout your essay.
I think you will need to condense somewhat so you have room to describe additional elements of your journey.
I would consider exchanging the story about the misdiagnosis with another patient story that shows you in action connecting on a human level. You want to show some of the traits that will make you an effective PA.
Also, I would include a paragraph that describes your shadowing experience of physician assistants. What about the interactions you witnessed between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient confirmed your decision?
I would also not use the term mini doctor as this may not set well with some readers.
Where you can, describe your medical experience and clinical skills.
I wish you good luck, Excel!
Erik says
Thank you for reviewing my essay in advance!
When I was 12 years old, I was awaiting the birth of my youngest brother and was excited to have another sibling. On the day he was born excitement turned into worry as he was rushed to the NICU with a IVH, or an intraventricular hemorrhage, which led to hydrocephalus. From that moment, I was unable to see him for around 2-3 weeks. It was decided that he required a VP shunt placement and our family had weeks of worry and turmoil leading up to the surgery. What I did notice at the hospital was how the physicians and PA’s treated and took care of him, frequently visiting my parents and reassuring them. The PA’s would spent longer amounts of time with them and would always take time with my family and the more I saw this, the more enamored I became with this career. Long story short, he went into surgery, which the doctors and PA’s helped in, and has since recovered through rehab and neurosurgery visits to be a healthy, lively 11 year old now. This experience shaped the decisions for me pursuing PA school because as a young 12-year-old, seeing the care the PA’s provided for my family during that rough stretch helped my family and me through that tough time, and in my eyes at the time, they were my superheroes for helping my brother.
As I entered college, I took general pre-med classes at UIC and was not entirely sure if that was the right fit. When I shadowed an ER doctor my sophomore year, I ran across PA’s in the ER and noticed the longer amounts of time they spent with patients and realized that they could change specialties. Throughout college, I was able to work at a physical therapy clinic, Athletico, and my desire to help others through healthcare increased. To be around different types of people of varying ages, lifestyles, and cultures was fascinating. The best part was whenever they finished up therapy and would come over to thank me for helping them, with some giving me presents or hugs. It taught me how to treat people as people, as funny as it sounds because we can get caught up in so many things that we forget to see them as people. My exposure to PA profession drove me to change my career path to Pre PA as I wanted a career that would let me make an impact on other people’s lives and allow me to challenge myself in a variety of specialties. I started to piece together that PA was the right route for me to take in the healthcare world.
As I learned more about this profession, I saw my life’s purpose through this career. When I view a PA, I see an effective communicator with strong teamwork skills, who can be efficient in many subsections of medicine. Working and volunteering in various areas of healthcare from hospitals to physical therapy clinics, I’ve developed strong communication skills and teamwork abilities along the way. For example, working in a physical therapy outpatient clinic, I have learned how to work cohesively with my other associates and have developed communication skills by learning how to deal with various types of patients with different personalities. To me these two skills are the most important a PA can have, and my healthcare experiences have led me to develop in those areas. When I view a PA, I see someone who is an effective communicator with strong teamwork skills, who can be a leader and advocate for good health which is what I am to be.
During my sophomore year, I made mistakes that have caused to have lackluster grades. These are all my mistakes and I take full accountability for them. I joined a dance team my sophomore year and made the choice to take difficult classes even with my advisor’s warnings. I wanted to challenge myself without knowing my limits and did not seek help because I felt I needed to get myself out of that situation. The combination of late practices, and being a commuter affected my early morning classes, and took a toll. My grades dipped and I had to reorganize my priorities and improve myself quickly. Afterwards, in my junior and senior year I had an upward trend in grades and finished off on a positive note. Despite the negative results, in some ways I am glad it happened because I realized the deficiencies I had, how to have better time management, and improve myself as an individual.
I also applied for the 2020-2021 cycle and did not get in. Even with this setback, it furthered my passion and I worked even harder to improve myself. I worked more as a Rehab Aide and gained lessons in managing a multitude of patients at once while improving my leadership qualities by taking younger aides under my wing and directing them during work. Furthermore, I shadowed multiple PA’s: one of whom worked in Orthopedic and Rheumatology sector of a hospital and the other who worked in an outpatient primary care setting. Both experiences allowed me to see the interactions with co-workers and patients and how each one managed different types of people, some of whom were harder to deal than others. I have realized that this is what I want to do, and furthermore this resolves my desire to become a PA.
I have been known to be compassionate, helpful, intrinsic, and a people’s person which would help me in this career. I chose this profession to be part of a team where I can live my purpose of helping others and will continue to fight to help my dreams of becoming a PA be a reality. I hope that schools will be able to see past my pedestrian GPA and give me a chance after seeing the changes I have made the last two years. With these experiences, I hope to be able to pursue my desire of becoming a Physician Assistant to be able to work in an environment where I can make a positive impact in the lives of other people through my values, demeanor, and expertise.
Whitney Prosperi says
Erik,
I can sense your desire to help patients expressed throughout your essay.
I would suggest condensing where you can so that you can add in some more elements to define your journey.
I would share a patient care story, possibly from your work in the PT clinic. Show yourself connecting with a patient on a personal level. You want to reveal some of the traits that will make you an effective PA.
I would also include more details from your shadowing of PAs. What about these interactions confirmed your decision?
You want to be careful to not sound like you are being critical of MDs so you may want to soften that language a bit.
Lastly, in your conclusion you may want to include a line that ties back to your introduction in some way.
Good luck to you, Eric!
Logan S says
“I need more Band-Aids!” I called out, as I stitched up my stuffed teddy bear using my suturing kit full of pencils. While the bear was in post-op, I used my stethoscope to check on his respiratory function and ensured they were comfortable. Satisfied with my work, I carefully placed my instruments on the floor of my childhood bedroom and ran to the kitchen for an afternoon snack. Despite my love for playing doctor, the irony was that I was scared to go into the doctor’s office. I would look to my mom as an advocate rather than speak for myself. When I finally had the courage to go alone, I remained quiet and full of nerves. What if I said something wrong? Will the doctor judge me for what I say? With the words stuck in my throat, I left those visits unfinished.
These memories reside in the back of my head as a constant reminder of why I want to go into medicine. I want to be a Physician Assistant, so my patients can become comfortable with the uncomfortable. It is essential that my patients can communicate their concerns without fear of judgment. As a Physician Assistant, I would be that bridge between patient comfort and care.
I was introduced to the PA profession in high school while shadowing a Physician Assistant at Christiana Breast Cancer Surgical Center. In the office, I observed port removals and annual breast exams. I enjoyed learning about a Physician Assistants’ level of autonomy, career flexibility, and focus on patient care. I continued to shadow in the Emergency Department at Abington Hospital where I was able to observe physician assistants, nurses, and physicians. A particular experience I remember is of a patient that came in at two in the morning with self-inflicted lacerations. As the PA applied their clinical knowledge, they showed patience. Despite being tired, the PA ensured the same level of care and concern as a patient that showed up mid-day. I aspire to be able to provide this experience to my patients.
Working as a wellness assistant at YMCA Camp Tockwogh, I have utilized my shadowing experiences. The wellness center received a call that a camper suffered a spinal injury while sailing. I arrived on the beach after the waterfront staff finished back boarding the camper. I helped bring the camper to a safe location and assessed for injuries while waiting for EMS. The camper was visibly frozen with fear and unable to tell us what hurt. Rather than sit there silently, I began to ask questions about sailing and their favorite camp activities. Once we had established a relationship of trust, he was comfortable enough to tell me where he was feeling pain.
At the end of the summer, I stayed in healthcare and became a radiology reading room assistant at Jefferson Hospital. My job was to ensure studies were accurately read and exported to proper destinations. In addition to expanding my use of medical terminology, I learned how to use different healthcare software and behind-the-scenes of patient care.
I am currently a medical assistant at MidLantic Urology where we see upwards of 150 patients a day. We treat a range of age groups and offer outpatient procedures such as vasectomies and InterStim Therapy in a fast-paced environment. Working in Urology has shown me I can help make those uneasy topics more comfortable. I work hard to ensure my patients feel safe discussing what they consider embarrassing such as erectile dysfunction or an overactive bladder. I enjoy having the opportunity to connect with my patients and make their visits more easygoing.
The experiences I have had throughout the years have deepened my passion for healthcare and becoming a Physician Assistant. I have learned the importance of multi-tasking, group collaboration, and attention to detail. Most importantly I have learned that without an inviting or comforting environment, patients are less likely to seek treatment or attend appointments that they scheduled. Therefore, I want to be an advocate for patients who deserve to be treated with respect and speak freely about their concerns knowing they will receive the utmost quality of care. As a Physician Assistant, I will use my experiences and education to be the best part of a patient’s worst day. Unlike my childhood encounters, I want to instill confidence, not just in my childhood stuffed animals, but in all my patients to speak up and be heard.
Whitney Prosperi says
Logan,
You are off to a good start.
I think you could separate your paragraph that talks about what appeals to you about the PA profession from your paragraph on shadowing. Also, elaborate some more in both of those paragraphs. What else about the physician assistant (not capitalized) role captivates you?
When talking about your shadowing experience, you could add some more detail as well.
I wish you good luck in the process, Logan!
Madison Jeffrey says
Hopefully you’ll be able to get to my essay! If so, thank you for your time and this is my first attempt so don’t judge!
For my entire life I have strived to be a doctor. Since a young age, I have been surrounded by a family of nurses and I wanted to be the one that could take their career to the next level. I was not even sure why I wanted to be one, which later I would find out was one of my problems. Every person I came across that asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up got the same answer “I want to be a doctor”. However, their next question always put me in a bind because I had no idea how to answer. The COVID-19 pandemic, which caused my path to being a doctor to be put on hold, made me realize why I could never answer why I wanted to be a doctor. There was never a life changing moment that I often hear about from fellow pre-medical students that made me decide “this is why I need to be a doctor”. After many months of being in a lull from the pandemic stopping me at every turn, I realized that maybe there was a reason nothing was working out for me.
While working as a Health Unit Coordinator (HUC) at Covenant hospital in Saginaw, Michigan, I was able to work alongside a wide variety of medical personnel. My interactions with doctors while not unpleasant, was not necessarily pleasant either. One of my tasks as a HUC was to page or call different doctors, surgeons, or physician assistants as needed. In doing so, I noticed that most of the doctors and surgeons only showed up to do their tasks and then leave. When I had to page physician assistants however, they went out of their way to greet myself and any of the nurses that were on the floor. Each one stayed with their patients after their checkup to get to know them and have conversations with them. After seeing this day after day, I understood that I wanted more out of patient care. I wanted to be able to have the time to stay and talk to patients about their daily lives instead of rushing off to get to the next patient. I want to make patients feel heard by their providers not just seen. There were two physician assistants that stood out when I worked at the hospital. Both were well known throughout the hospital because they were so talkative, and they knew so much about everything. Any problem we had, the nurses would say “Hey Madison, call Matt, he will know what to do”.
After more research into what being a physician assistant entails, I had found exactly what I was looking for. Everything about being a physician assistant fit like putting the last piece into a 1,000-piece puzzle. One of the traits of being a physician assistant that stands out the most to be is the ability to work in any specialty and the ability to change specialties if I wanted to. When I wanted to be a doctor, I could never decide what type of doctor I wanted to be. It usually switched whenever I learned something new in Anatomy. One week it was cardiology, the next it was neurology, the one constant was that I knew I wanted to be involved with surgery of some sort. That is the beauty of being able to choose as a physician assistant rather than your specialty being decided in medical school and having to stick with one for the rest of your career. As a physician assistant, I wouldn’t need to receive years of extra education just to switch, I would be able to switch without going back to school.
Being a physician assistant will allow me to be focused on patient care. When I shadowed an internal medicine doctor and now being a scribe for a podiatrist, I found out that most of their day is taken up by budgets, insurance companies, and other things that take focus away from the patients themselves even when they go home for the day. I want to be able to focus on the patient and the patient alone. I also want to be able to have a good work-life balance. I don’t have any kids now, but I want to be able to know that when I do, I will be able to make time for them when I come home from work. As a scribe, I like the fact that I can focus on what the patient is saying and being able to engage them in conversation while the podiatrist is doing her procedures. One of my favorite days of being a scribe was when I went into the room with the doctor and one of the patients thought I was a physician assistant. Usually, I follow behind the doctor with my laptop and set up on the counter to start typing. This patient started talking directly to me because she knew I was typing everything she was saying. After she told us her problem in her foot, she asked me if I was training because she thought PAs came in on their own without a doctor. I answered her, “no I’m not training, I am just the scribe” she then asked what I was going to school for to which I responded, “to be a physician assistant”.
Whitney Prosperi says
Madison,
I can sense your passion to connect with patients on a human level.
I would suggest cutting your discussion about your initial desire to become a doctor. Instead use the characters for why you do want to become a PA. Also, you never want to appear to be critical of other providers so I would steer clear of any discussion about doctors being bogged down in details or their lack of time with patients.
I would also include a patient care story. You want to show yourself in action caring for a patient on a personal level.
Elaborate on any clinical skills or medical experience you have gained in your jobs.
I would also include a section about any shadowing of PAs you have had. What inspired you about interactions between patient/PA or patient/supervising physician?
For your conclusion, I would tie back to your introduction in some way and reiterate your desire to care for patients.
I wish you good luck in the process, Madision.
Kendra Benton says
I greatly appreciate you taking the time to review our essays! Thank you in advance for your feed back.
As an undergraduate freshman, I had zero contact hours. My dorm resident assistance advised me to get an EMT license, which I obtained during my spring semester. EMS has expanded my knowledge and experience in medicine which has fueled my ambition to pursue further advancements in the medical field.
During my time as an EMT, I have held the hands of countless patients and offered them reassurance during a time when they felt helpless. I have comforted family members when nothing more could be done to save their loved ones. My colleagues have taught me what it means to work as a team and the importance of communication as well as attentive listening. While working directly with patients I have learned how to be compassionate as well as empathetic. As I work with my patients, I have found that am limited by my current knowledge and skills, I have a desire to expand my expertise in medicine. Becoming a physician assistant is my chance to expand and develop my skills and learning in a field that is ever changing.
Through my volunteer experience, shadowing opportunities, and medical experience it has become obvious that this profession is what I want to do. I have worked alongside many physicians, physician assistants, and nurse practitioners to save the lives of multiple patients. This has given me the opportunity to see the difference made when medical professionals communicate and work together to achieve their goals in patient care. Through all of my involvement with multiple medical professionals, it became clear that physician assistants exemplified on the kind of care I wanted to be able to offer to my patients. The opportunity to practice multiple specialties and the autonomy of the physician assistant profession is something that fulfills my desire to expand my medical knowledge, without focusing on just one specific area of medicine.
I am aware that in becoming a physician assistant both personal and academic excellence is a necessity. I would like admissions to look past my mediocre GPA and see the growth and knowledge I have gained since the start of my undergraduate program. During my freshman year, I found my courses to be quite easy and required very little studying. In my sophomore year I quickly learned that I had no study skills and was very unorganized when it came to balancing multiple hard classes, athletics, and my social life. Through the help of my peers and some major life adjustments, I was able to learn the skills required to help me succeed in my academics while maintaining my extracurricular activities. Although these circumstances caused quite the setback, specially in my academia, I was given the opportunity to improve myself and work hard towards the goals I had set for myself. The skills I have learned during my time as an undergraduate student and as a medical professional have prepared me for the trials and tribulations I may face, and because of this I am confident in my ability to succeed as a physician assistant.
Whitney Prosperi says
Kendra,
You may want to open with a patient care story that shows you in action providing clinical care of some kind while comforting a patient. This might be a good way to grab the reader’s attention and show some of what you have to offer as a future PA.
If you have any shadowing experience I would also include that. What did you observe in watching interactions between PA/supervising physician or PA/patient that confirmed your decision to pursue this path?
I would also include more detail about what specifically appeals to you about the PA profession.
I would spotlight some of the clinical skills and medical knowledge that you have gained.
I think you are wise to address grade issues if needed. You may want to include any “gains” you have had since college.
For your conclusion, I would tie back to the story you tell in your introduction and reiterate your desire to care for patients.
Good luck to you, Kendra!